Page 24 of Between Now & Heartbreak

“If he found out I was seeing you, he’d find a way to stop it,” she’d said .

Fuck.

“Wow. So, what happened?” I panic and glance at her when I realize I’ve slipped and called her by my nickname. She doesn’t appear to have noticed.

“Nothing. She disappeared. Just gone. Theysaidshe went to live with her grandmother.”

“Is that in a different town?”

“Yeah, near Dallas.Ithink she was in rehab,” Etta says, her grin is sinister. I’m used to people making shit up about me and my family. But they’re gossip columnists. Not my neighbors. The dexterity with which Etta vaults her verbal missiles is clearly a result of practice.

“Is Beth…like who are her friends?”

“If her Instagram is to believed, Georgia and a girl named Ava. But who knows. She came home from hergrandmothers,”she puts mimes air quotes and rolls her eyes, “looking like a new person. Ms. Perfect. And now she’s got her perfect fiancé.”

“So, they weren’t dating before?”I ask, surprised that anyone would describe him that way.

“Of course not. He would never have. I think his Daddy is making him do it. I mean, I don’t see what else it could be. She’s like plastic. You know? I heard she’s got all sorts of fillers in her face. Not that I’ve been close enough to find out for myself.” She snorts derisively. “She goes all the way to Houston to get her highlights done like she’s fucking Ms. America, or something. Not that I want her business. The smell is sulfur would be bad for business.”

Bitterness must run in long, uninterrupted cords through her veins. She seems consumed by it.

“You know they’re cursed, right?” Her voice has lost some of its edge, but it feel forced. Like she knows she might have gone too far and is trying to pretend that she’s not dead serious.

I’ll play along because her dislike of Beth is extreme and disconcerting.

“Who’s cursed?”

She shoots me a glance and her annoyance is clear as day. “Herfamily.” If she’d added a “you sack of numb nuts" to the end of that sentence it couldn’t have been more patronizing. “Like the Kennedy’s, ya know? She has another brother. Older than the one who died. But he disappeared. But heard Wolf disowned him because he was gay.”

“Would he really have done that?”

“Oh yeah.. I mean, it may be the 21stcentury in NYC, but here we… time stopped when Ronald Regan died.” She laughs.

It’s possible that her theory about the cause of his leaving is pure conjecture with no basis in fact, but that it’s even in the realm of possibility makes me sad for them. Her father doesn’t deserve the children he’s been given. What an asshole. Maybe monster wasn’t harsh enough.

“Anyway, just watch out for her. She’s an opportunist. If she finds out who you are, she’ll be after you, too.”

My skin feels too tight for my body. It’s hard to sit and listen to hear her talk about Beth like that and say nothing in her defense. Things may have been turned upside down, but the Beth I spent the night with last summer is therealher.

I know it, the way I know water is wet.

Whatever she’s done, or said, she’s not a malicious, self-absorbed, fake. Not even close.

But I bite my tongue. Because to defend her would reveal things I don’t want Etta to know. In her hands, the truth about us would be repurposed into ammunition.

“Can you drop me off at the car rental place instead of the B & B?” I ask after a minute of silence.

“Sure. OrIcould give you a ride. Any time you like,” she says in a sly voice. Even though I pretend not to get it, the suggestion isn’t lost on me.

I give her a side long glance. Her blonde hair is cut in a blunt bob that hovers right at her jaw line that gives her an edge. I imagine that without it, her youthful, large eyed, wide mouthed face would make her look like she’s twelve. I’ve only seen her a handful of times, but she’s always wearing a variation of the same thing. Jeans, a white t-shirt and lots of bright beaded jewelry. She’s got a great laugh and when she’s not talking about Elisabeth, she’s really easy going. But this woman is a shark and god help the person who gets in her ocean with a paper cut they didn’t even realize they had.

“I told you, I’m not looking for anything right now. You’re a great--” I say as apologetically as I can.

She nods. “Save the pretty words for someone who needs them. Arideis all I was offering. I’ve yet to meet a man worth the skin he was born in.” Her tone is matter of fact, but her jaw ticks.

“I’ll try not to take that personally.” I say dryly.

“It’s not. Ya’ll can’t help being born with dicks instead of hearts.”

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