Page 97 of Taste of Death

Cyan glared daggers at me. “I’m nothing like you, Novak. You kept your deal with Carpe Noctem hidden from her. Who betrays their blood mate like that?”

My head cocked to the side. “I seem to remember you having a colorful reputation before settling down with Tavia. You didn’t exactly discriminate where your blood sources came from, did you?”

A twitch of his mouth was the only warning before Cyan shot up and lunged at me. Rhain, moving impressively fast for his size, stopped him with a hand to his chest.

“Easy,” the bigger vampire said. “He’s trying to get under your skin. Don’t give him that.”

Rhain all but forced Cyan back to his seat. The mated vampire was huffing and puffing with anger, but stayed put.

“Do you need to step out?” Thorne asked, barely looking at him.

“No, I’m good,” Cyan said.

“You sure?”

“Yes.” Cyan’s glare was molten on me. “I’ll stay civil as long as he does.”

“My apologies,” I offered. “I should’ve known you’d be… sensitive about your past.”

“Watch your mouth,” Cyan hissed through his teeth. “You know who’s sensitive? Amy. Nothing wrong with it, but you hurt someone who feels pain very deeply. My mate wants to string you up by your balls, said it would ensure you never get that heir you desperately wanted. Honestly, I don’t see why I should stop her.”

I almost nodded my agreement. Tavia was fiercely, almost violently protective of Amy. With how badly I fucked up, I was relieved to know she still had support. A friend and the entire ruling clan to help her.

But what I planned to offer was hopefully more useful than my mutilated genitals.

“Did you demand this meeting for an actual reason or just to poke Cyan’s bear?” Thorne stubbed out his darakt cigarette and lit up another. Cyan lit up too, eager to take the edge off his temper. The human waitress came by with a drink on her tray and set it in front of Rhain.

“I no longer claim Rathka’s Order as my clan,” I said. “I want to remove myself from that lineage, and everything associated with it.”

This time, Thorne’s eyebrows lifted in genuine surprise. “You want to renounce your clan?”

“I understand it’s unprecedented, but I’m willing to cooperate with whatever methods you decide to make this official and legal.” I reached inside my jacket and pulled out a folded letter, placing it on the low table between me and the three of them. “That’s my formal renouncement. In that letter, I’ve also condemned the cruelties and abuses that my ancestors committed upon yours. I’ve listed out the ones I know of. If there’s more you’d like me to add, I’d be happy to.”

Thorne said nothing as he unfolded the letter, his two clansmen leaning in to read over his shoulder. When he reached the end, the slightest smile quirked his mouth as his gaze lifted to me.

“Novak, formerly of Rathka’s Order, now extinct.” He read aloud my signature at the bottom.

“I haven’t chosen a new clan name yet, but I can amend the letter when I do.”

“You’re really willing to let the proud name of your ancestors die out? Our memories are long, Novak, but everything that dies is eventually forgotten.”

“Yes, I am.”

“Why?” Thorne demanded with narrowed eyes.

I shifted in my seat, at first unsure of how personal I should get, but then remembered Amy’s bravery. Not only in showing me her physical scars but trusting me enough to let her guard down and be vulnerable. I ached without her presence in my cold, lonely house, but I could still draw on her for inspiration.

For her, I had to lay it all out on the line.

“I spent my whole life trying to live up to the standards of Rathka’s Order, even after they all wasted away from the Curse,” I said. “Countless hours running tests, trying to bend magic, science, and medicine to my will so that I could cure them. Because surely a cure would elevate me past a useless second son in my father’s eyes. And if I had an heir on the way, even better. The clan would surely be restored to its former glory, and I would have the love and respect of my family.”

My gaze fell to the table. “Amy made me realize I was trying to win the approval of ghosts, that I was stuck in the past like an insane person, doing the same thing over and over again while expecting different results. The truth I didn’t want to face was that my family never cared. The first two hundred years of my life proved that. It didn’t matter that I had three doctorate degrees, learned to read and write faster than my brother, and brought our clan out of the dark ages with modern technology. No matter what I did, I was never good enough for them. So you see, Thorne,” I lifted my head, meeting the gazes across from me, “I was never truly part of Rathka’s Order to begin with. And I’m happy to let a cruel, abusive legacy become extinct.”

Thorne leaned back, his expression pensive. Rhain also looked thoughtful, his gaze cast to the side. Only Cyan regarded me with suspicion.

“So you want the go-ahead to start a new clan and renounce your old one,” he summarized. “Anything else?”

“No, but I would like to offer a few tokens of good faith. In the future, maybe we can consider ourselves allies.”

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