Page 40 of Healing Souls

Harley’s eyes gloss over as a look of devastation comes over her, but then she seems to lock it down. Her features hardening and her back straightening. “From Tammy?” she says, emotionless, cold. Cade nods. “No.”

“What happened?” I ask softly.

“Do you know what happened to my mom?”

“She died in a house fire,” Ry answers, frowning.

Harley shakes her head, her eyes lighting up with fury and her fists clenching on her thighs.

“No.” She takes a deep breath. “I mean, she died in a house fire. But it wasn’t what it was made out to be. I looked into it when I was at Brielle’s house. They covered up what really happened.”

“What happened?” I ask, leaning in.

Harley seems to get lost in her head as she looks off at the wall behind us. Ryker hesitantly reaches forward and takes her hand. She jerks and looks down as Ry rests both of his hands on hers.

He murmurs, “If you’re not ready, you don’t have to say anything. But we will listen when you are. We have all been through shit that has forced us to grow up much sooner than we ever needed to, so we understand.”

Looking from Ry to me and then to Cade, who is still standing behind Ry’s chair, Harley takes a few deep breaths and then focuses on Ry’s hands again, the ones still resting on top of hers. She admits, “I don’t really talk about it. I told Brielle and the guys about it because I felt like I had to. But I don’t want to do things because I feel like I have to do them. I want to do things on my own terms now.”

She speaks so quietly, so subdued, it is clear that her mind has wandered away from here and now. “I understand.” Cade grumbles.

Ry and I tense as we look at him, neither of us having expected him to speak. Harley slowly raises her eyes and looks at him as he walks closer and crouches down next to her.

“My voice was used against me,” he explains carefully. “I never had a say in the things I had to do.” He looks at Ry and I, his expression dark. “I stopped talking when I was in a safe environment. My father used my voice as a weapon.”

He takes a deep breath and looks back at Harley. I rest my hand on Ry’s shoulder and give it a light squeeze.

My brother, who has been through hell and back, chose to stop speaking. We all respected it, and Ry and I learned to deal with it because we love Cade as a brother. He’s family, and when you go through shitty things as kids and then find people who truly care about you, you learn pretty quickly that you would do anything for them and they would do anything for you.

Harley watches Cade. Her eyes seem to search his. It’s like she thinks she can see through him somehow, into him. I have seen her do it with me, Ry, Rage, and now Cade.

She inhales sharply and pulls her hand away from where Ry was still touching it. It shakes as she lifts it and rests her palm against Cade’s cheek.

Cayden

Her delicate, soft, cool palm touches my cheek. She’stouchingme.

I watch her beautiful hazel eyes widen in surprise. Even as she is the one touching me, she is shocked by her own actions. Without conscious thought, I tilt my head slightly and press my cheek harder into her palm. My eyes flutter shut as I let out a breath.

A weight of I’m not even sure what, is lifted from my chest. It feels like I have been lost up until now. My brothers have been lost too when it comes to me.

But this tiny redheaded spitfire who is completely turning our worlds upside down is also bringing us back to life. I don’t even know why I talked. Fuck, I don’t even know why I came in here to begin with. I got back from running with Bear yet again and found Nerds wandering around the main room, looking a little frantic. He said that they were in the tech room, and he wanted to give them some privacy.

It says a lot about him because he clearly didn’t like not having access to what he deems as his domain and seems to be a safe space for him to land.

I immediately walked back here. It almost feels like my body makes these choices for me because I am not even thinking. Like now, coming to squat in front of Harley and talking. It wasn’t planned.

I just understood her and wanted her to know I did. Plus, it didn’t bother me as much as I thought it would that my brothers were in here to hear what I said, too.

Harley’s breath hitches, pulling me back to the present. I open my eyes and stare at hers, seeing them water, but she quickly blinks away her tears. “This is all so confusing. I was supposed to hate you all,” she whispers, almost to herself.

“Why were you supposed to hate us?” Ry questions in a low voice, taut with anger.

She shakes her head and pulls her hand away from my face. My hand twitches, wanting to grab her wrist and pull her palm back to my cheek, but I stop myself, standing up and grabbing a chair to sit in.

Harley watches me closely, not answering Ryker’s question. “How do you do that?” She asks, staring at me, then swiveling her head around to look at Ry and Cade too. “How–how do you make me feel… seen? This wasn’t how any of this was supposed to go. My mind is spinning so fast I don’t even know which direction is up and down.”

Her breaths come faster, and she clutches a hand to her chest. Grayson nudges Ryker’s chair out of the way and scoots forward. Taking both of her hands in his, he gets in her line of sight.

---