Page 21 of Shit Happens in Ivydell

She laughs softly in my arms, takes another sip in silence. I can feel the caution in the sudden tensing of her body. She wants to know more, and if I don’t open up now, I might never.

I force the words out. “There was someone else in the car that night.”

“You weren’t an only child?”

“I was. Her name was Jenna. She managed the tasting room at Stinger Winery. She’d just passed her sommelier exam. A few years older than me. Smart. Ambitious. We’d both tried to convince my dad to open a smaller biodynamic winery and let us run it for him, but he never liked an idea that wasn’t his. And he hated that one.”

“She was more than a coworker.”

“We were engaged. Too young, probably, but nobody could’ve told us that.”

“You were Jensen and Jenna? That’s seriously fucking adorable.”

“Yeah, she always thought so, too. We had big plans. She was leaving Stinger Winery. So was I. We were going to open the biodynamic winery on our own. Cut ties.”

“Did your dad know?”

“He knew she was leaving. She’d given him her resignation with thirty days of notice, which was more than he deserved.I never shared my plans, and he never asked, but I’m sure he assumed I’d follow her. He was angry, but he’d always been angry.”

“Where were they all going together?”

“There was an annual charity gala coming up. All the wineries in the area took turns hosting. It was Stinger Winery’s year. It’s why Jenna offered to stay for thirty days. They were going to a meeting that she didn’t really need to attend, but he insisted, and she didn’t want to cause any more conflict. Everybody knows everybody in the industry.”

“Did they make it to the meeting?”

“No. He crossed over into oncoming traffic and hit a truck head-on. They were all dead by the time the ambulances got there.”

“Oh, God, Jensen. I’m so sorry.”

“I don’t know what was going in the car that caused him to do that. But he did it. He killed her. He killed all three of them. There was nobody alive to answer questions, so I’ll never know why it happened. But I’ll always wonder if they were arguing about me, and he turned around to yell at her. He always wanted to look you in the eye when he had a point to make. Intimidation was his favorite tactic.”

Her tears fall onto my arm. I don’t want her to cry. Not about this, not about anything ever, but I’m glad I told her. It’s a relief to share this part of my story. But it’s unfair to burden her with my tragedy when she’s still processing her own grief. Fuck.

There’s no good way, no right time to reveal this stuff. No easy path. She deserved to know, though. My history is fucked up. It’s not fair to let her walk further into my life blind to it.

She wipes her eyes, tilts her head back, and kisses me softly.

“If you have more questions, you can ask, Ivy. I’ll tell you whatever you want to know.”

“I’m sure I’ll have more soon, but not tonight. But if you want to talk about it some more, please do.”

“Not tonight.”

“You can talk about her around me, Jensen. Always. I can’t imagine how hard it’s been to keep her memory bottled up. Not to share your stories that include her. It doesn’t have to be a secret you keep locked away. Jenna is always going to be a part of you. And I’ll always understand that. I promise.”

I play with her hair, but not to make her sleepy. I just need to feel the softness of it.

She blinks away fresh tears. “Do you want to go sit outside and stare at the stars while we drink more champagne, and just listen to the silence together? To just be for a while?”

“More than I’ve wanted anything in a long goddamned time. But, um, how long do you actually think you can be quiet before something freaks you out and you lose your shit?”

“There’s only one way to find out.” She shrugs. “Peace only ever lasts for so long. You’ve got to enjoy it while you can.”

“You willing to share that chocolate?”

“Only with you.”

Ivy

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