Page 30 of Broken Bonds

Frowning, I move closer to the desk and snatch up the paper to look at it more closely.

The Legend of the Phoenix: The Real-Life Inspiration Behind the Myth

What the hell? Why does Samantha have an article about phoenixes? I turn my gaze from the paper to the rest of her materials and to my complete shock, see that most of what she has laid out here is research about phoenixes. Most of what I can see has to do with the legends surrounding us, with some focusing primarily on the myths’ origins, but some papers have writings about specific aspects phoenixes are supposed to be known to possess.

What’s worse than the books and articles themselves, however, are the notes. She has notes scribbled everywhere. On the papers, in the margins of the books, on sticky pads…every piece of research is littered with her handwriting in some way. I read her notes carefully and feel a sickening twist in my stomach. She’s highlighting things and making connections to her research, which I quickly realize has to do with human regeneration.

The world seems to tip beneath my feet, and for a second I think I might really lose my balance and fall over. This can’t be real. This has to be a nightmare. The pain in my heart tells me it’s very real, however, and I suspect that Samantha has betrayed me. Used me, somehow, for her own gains. My fingers clench and I crush the paper in my hand.

“Aleixo? What are you doing?”

Her soft, sleep-filled voice washes over me and for a moment, my rage melts away. I want to go back to her bed and hold her and forget I ever saw any of this. But I can’t. I know I can’t, and as I gaze down at the evidence of her treachery, the anger bubbles up within me and burns away those tender feelings like fire burns up kindle.

I round on her and wave the fist I still have clenched around her paper.

“What the hell is this?” I demand to know.

She frowns at me and sits up. The sheet drops to her waist, revealing her bare breasts which tempt me to distraction, but I resist. Her face is still soft from sleep and I can tell that she’s struggling to catch up with what exactly is going on. I see the exact moment realization hits her. Her eyes go wide and her face pales.

“Oh…oh, Aleixo, that’s not what you think it is…”

“What do I think it is?” I hiss. “Huh? Tell me, then tell me why the hell you have all this information on phoenixes. Were you just using me this whole time?”

She frantically shakes her head. “No! No, of course not. I swear, Aleixo, I didn’t know what you were until you rescued me from the that ravine.”

“Liar,” I snap, crumpling up the paper and tossing it away. “You’re a damn liar! This isn’t a coincidence. It can’t be! What were you hoping to achieve? To trick me into trusting you so that I’d let you experiment on me? Is that it?”

“What? No!” she exclaims. She grabs the sheet and clutches it to her chest as she hurries to crawl out of the bed. When she’s standing in front of me, she gazes up at me imploringly and says, “I would never do that to you, I swear!”

“Why should I believe you?” I growl. “Why should I believe a single word you’ve said to me since we met? You’ve hidden so much as it is. Your research, your interest in phoenixes, your leg…”

She jerks back as if I’ve struck her, her expression stricken. I realize too late that I’ve crossed a line mentioning her leg, but I’m so furious, I can’t think straight. Her eyes narrow and she glares at me as her gaze turns wet and glassy.

“I kept my research from you, because that was our agreement,” she sharply replies, though I can hear the emotion in her voice. It makes me feel like a huge asshole, but I hold onto my own anger at her and what she’s been trying to do to me. “I kept my interest in phoenixes from you because I didn’t think it mattered, and I kept my leg a secret from you because it was none of your damn business!”

I take a step back at her vehement tone, then grit my teeth and snarl, “That’s what your research is for though, right? Why you’re studying those birds and why you’re so fascinated with my kind. You want to find a way to grow your leg back, don’t you?” I don’t know why I’m saying these things, because she is absolutely right. It isn’t my business. Or is it? If that’s why she’s been trying to get close to me, then don’t I have a right to know?

“I want to find a way to help people who’ve lost a piece of themselves,” she shoots back. “I want to help people feel whole again.”

“By using me and my kind!” I bellow. This is why I’ve kept myself away from humans for so long. Why I haven’t revealed what I am for years. Humans are greedy and opportunistic. I’ve seen it countless times throughout my life, and I’d been a fool to think you would be any different.

It’s the damn bond. It’s made me blind to what she really is. If it weren’t for this connection, which I never asked for, I’d have seen through her lies by now. I wouldn’t have let myself get so close to her. I wouldn’t have let myself fall into bed with her.

Once more, the mating bond has done me far more harm than it ever could good.

I should have broken the bond the moment I felt it emerging. It’s not too late, though. I can still free myself from this…from her.

“I wasn’t using you!” she insists. “Why won’t you believe me? What can I do to prove it to you?”

The way she’s staring at me…the seemingly pure desperation in her eyes…I can almost believe she’s being sincere. A part of me wants so badly to believe it that I can feel my resolve begin to slip ever so slightly. I resist the urge to give in, though. History has shown me that humans can’t be trusted. It’s a tragedy I’ve watched play out again and again throughout my long life. To think Samantha would somehow be above that is ludicrous.

I have to get out of here. I have to break this damn bond before it makes me stupid for her again. She’s still staring at me, waiting for a reply, but there isn’t one. There’s nothing she can do. The sooner I break her hold on me, the better. Turning, I storm toward the door.

“Aleixo! Wait!” she calls after me, but I don’t stop. I can’t stop. If I do, I know I won’t be able to resist her pull. I keep my gaze ahead of me and ignore her pleas to return as I throw open her door and walk out without slowing.

I keep walking past my own room and away from the dormitories. Making my way through the facility, I briefly wonder if she’s going to follow me. Is there a part of me that’s even hoping for that? Gods, what a mess this is. This feels so much more complex than when I was with my first mate. With her, though we were bonded, I still knew that I hated her. I don’t hate Samantha…or, I didn’t. I’m not sure now. Regardless, there’s a reluctance inside me to break the bond that wasn’t there with my first mate. I was eager to be rid of her memories haunting me when I didn’t want them. As I near my lab, knowing what it is I’m about to do…I’m not quite so sure as I was the first time. Still, I know it has to be done. I can’t live like this. Not again.

I make it to my lab and hurry inside, shutting the door and locking it behind me. I lean my back against the cool steel of the door and let out a long sigh. I feel so heavy…weighed down by everything I’ve discovered about Samantha. It’s just not fair. For a moment, I thought that there could be something real there…something beyond the bond.

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