Page 55 of Shattered Hearts

I don’t waste a second suiting up and I’m hugged by her tight heat, claiming her as she lifts her hips, inviting every thrust.

It’s not the silkiness of her skin that sets me off, or her dark brown eyes as she looks at me. It isn’t her sweet pink nipplesrubbing against my chest or her hair splayed over my pillow. It isn’t her berry pink lips or the velvet touch of her fingertips.

It’s none of those things and all of them at once, and it’s difficult to keep control. I hide my face and breathe into her neck. I need to keep her safe. I need to protect her because like Troy, I can’t live without my other half.

She brushes her fingers through my hair and nibbles my jaw, my whiskers scratching her lips. “Are you okay?”

“No.” Her pillow muffles my voice. “Let’s run away together.”

“Okay. Wherever you want to go.”

I lift my head and stare into her eyes. “One day we will. One day we’ll hide and no one will be able to find us.”

“And live on love?” she asks, teasing, her fragile voice in my ear. Our lovemaking turned her cheeks pink, and the corners of her mouth lift up in amusement.

“You’re all I need.”

“I love you, Gage.”

“Don’t ever stop. Please.”

“I won’t.”

I’m still inside her, but I grow soft. I’m not sated, not by a long shot, but I’m tired. Tired of picking up pieces that won’t make sense when I try to shove them together.

Reluctantly, I pull out and clean up in the bathroom. When I go back into the bedroom, Baby’s in bed, and she looks at me mournfully, hoping I won’t kick her off. I sigh. I’ve given Zarah a lot of time, and she’s been a good sport. I crawl between the sheets, but it’s not long before I’m crabby. Baby gives no fucks and falls asleep, her head on Zarah’s pillow, snoring into the faded cotton.

Zarah laughs. “She’s a sweet girl.”

“Ah-huh.” I roll onto my side and push my arm under my pillow. I cover Zarah’s hand with mine, her fingers digging deep into Baby’s fur. “Can I ask you something?”

A guarded look passes through her eyes and I can feel her mentally withdraw. She’s as tired as I am. “What?”

“Rourke didn’t want Max to marry you because of what Ash made you do.” I stop.

Tears fill her eyes. “Is that your question?”

“No. At Max’s award dinner...” I fade off, trying to put my thoughts into words. “He didn’t...show us how he felt about you. He was polite.”

Zarah sits up and covers her breasts with the sheet. Her hair is messy and the skin around her mouth is pink where my whiskers rubbed her too long and too hard. “What are you saying? Are youblamingme?”

I sit up too and grab my shorts off the floor, the serene atmosphere we had cocooning us broken. “No. We all thought your reaction was a reaction to his. But—” I sigh, pulling on my shorts. “I’m trying to word this right and I’m doing a craptastic job. You were scared of him, Zarah. When have you met Max’s dad?”

She shakes her head, the ends of her inky black hair grazing her slim shoulders. “I’ve never met Senator Cook before.”

“Then why such a strong reaction? You were terrified of him. What did he do to you?”

“He wanted to hurt me.Again. I saw it in his eyes, the way he looked at me. I could hear it in his voice. He liked it.”

I scoop a t-shirt into my hand, my gut sick with dread. “When? When did he hurt you? When would he have had the chance, sweetheart?” I want to comfort her, but as the weeks go on and we spend more time together, I learn her cues, and right now she doesn’t want me to touch her. I take her feelings seriously—in her memories I don’t ever want to be associated with pain.

Not like that.

Sometimes I push at her, help her understand things from a different angle, even if it hurts. She’s been coddled for a long time. It might not be my job to push at her boundaries, but she can’t get better if people aren’t willing to make her uncomfortable. I want her to recover and the trade-off, long-term, is worth it to me, but after making love, while she’s naked in my bed, I never want to be the enemy. She’s had enough of those.

“I don’t know. His voice—like razor blades against my skin, so sharp I don’t know I’m hurt until the blood drips.”

Fuck.

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