Page 118 of Scandalous Lover

I trusted my influencer community, and I got burned alive.

My own family never wanted me.

What a damn fool I was to think it would ever be different. That I could ever be a person who was important enough to someone to keep around. To make real sacrifices for.

That I was, all of a sudden, after never once in my life being good enough for anyone, good enough for Sam.

Well, he sure showed me.

After my big blowout on the internet back in Austin, I was convinced that nothing could ever surprise me again. That whole thing came so far out of left field, blindsidedme to the point where I thought it was a joke for hours after it all started to go up in flames.

It’s only all these weeks later that I was finally starting to process what happened. Starting to see the signs I chose to ignore from the beginning. Starting to reevaluate the relationships I thought were so solid.

It was the safety of Sam’s arms that gave me the space to be able to do that.

Maybe that’s where I went wrong. I felt secure and cared for and allowed myself to get distracted. To let my mind wander.

When I should have been paying more attention to the current snake in the room.

My heart aches for the simplicity of yesterday. Of this morning, even.

When I woke in that bed, Sam bringing me coffee and kissing me goodbye before work. He really did all that thinking I was a loser. Someone who couldn’t be trusted.

A fresh wave of shame washes over me as I allow myself to see the truth.

He never had any intention of making things real between us. He’s a responsible adult with a real job and a community. Friends and a resort that he needs to watch out for.

And what am I?

I’m nothing. I’m a loser with no plan for life. Nowhere to go. No one to turn to.

“Naomi!”

I turn my head out of instinct but immediately turn it back forward when I see Sam jogging up the path behind me.

“God, you’re fast.” He’s huffing like he just ran the whole way up the sandy trail from the resort.

I continue to ignore him, arms folded, eyes focused on the ground in front of me as I put one foot in front of the other. Ionly have to make it to the employee parking lot where I left my loaner golf cart, and then I’m free. I have no idea where I’ll go, but wherever it is, I’m going there fast.

“If you don’t stop walking in one second, I’m going to make you stop,” he says, still keeping pace with me as I refuse to look over.

I huff out a laugh and pick up my pace.

A strong hand clamps down on my upper arm and pulls sharply, forcing me to stop and turn to face him. I hang my head and try to look away.

Thank god for mirrored sunglasses. He can’t see how much I’ve been crying.

“That was…it wasn’t what it sounded like,” he starts, and I consider kicking him so he’ll let me go.

Actually, that’s not a bad plan.

I land a sharp kick on his shin with the sole of my flip-flop.

Sam barks in pain and drops my arm. I continue up the hill.

“Okay, I deserved that. I get it. You’re pissed and you have every right to be. You weren’t supposed to be there.”

Red rage renders me blind and sucks all the rational thought from my mind. I stop and whirl to face him. “I wasn’t supposed to be there? That’s your excuse? You have got to be kidding me!”

---