Page 122 of Scandalous Lover

“Being afraid is sometimes easier than doing hard things. Especially if those hard things go against what we’ve always done. Sam has never stood up to his friends because he sees himself as less. You refuse to fight for what you want for the same reason.”

Petunia claps her hands together, excitement lighting up her face. “I can’t wait to see what happens.”

“I agree,” Max concurs, smiling at his wife.

I want to be mad. I want to be annoyed as hell at the way they’re making light of the crushing reality of my situation. But even in the lowest place of my life, I can see the futility of it. “Yeah, I guess I’m looking forward to it as well. At least, I am now.”

They beam at me.

It’s impossible not to smile back.

Chapter Forty-Four

Sam

Iwalk back down the sandy trail to the resort with heavy feet. And a heavy heart.

I lost my mind during that meeting.

I wasn’t thinking. I wasn’t myself.

I can’t believe I said those things. Things that I have never, not one single time, thought before. I just needed them to change their minds, and I was willing to say anything.

I’m not just sorry because Naomi was there to overhear. I would be sorry for my words either way.

But the fact that she just drove away thinking that’s how I see her? It breaks my heart.

I’ve watched her come so far over the last couple of weeks. Coming out of her shell. Finding joy in little things. She was starting to trust herself again.

And I just ruined all of that.

The rush of air conditioning hits me as I push through the lobby doors, and I breathe a sigh of relief that I don’t deserve.

I caused this whole mess by choosing not to be truthful from the very beginning.

Never in my life have I created anything close to the web of lies I now find myself living in and look where it got me. My reputation is built on my integrity. If anything was going to put my standing at the resort and my friendships at risk, it was breaking that trust.

Not falling in love.

I want to hate myself for my stupidity, but it won’t change anything. And it certainly won’t help solve this mess I’ve made.

Only one thing will help with that.

I bypass my office and head straight to the Raft kitchen.

“Hey,” I say when I spot Dom. “We need to talk.”

He turns from where he’s helping a cook outline a prep list and glares at me. “So you can explain why you busted out of that meeting like a crazy person? Yeah, I’d say we need to talk.”

I fold my arms, not standing down. “My office or yours?”

He glances over his shoulder at the closed door of his shared restaurant office. “Yours.”

“Fine.”

I turn and walk back toward the lobby without waiting. I’m sitting at my desk when he finally pushes my office door open.

We just stare at each other for a moment, both of us with our arms crossed on our chests. I want to see the humor in this situation, this standoff, but I’m too anxious. I just blurt out my next words.