“That is all valid and true,” she says in her soothing voice. I brace myself for the but. “But Dom lost his mother that day, too. He?—”
That’s the end for me. I shake her off and spin around on the sandy path, unconcerned about how I look or how emotional my voice is going to sound.
“Reina, that man has had my entire life to play siblings and commiserate over the loss of our mother. He never even tried. And now, now that he’s so worried about my future? You heard him. He’s only worried that I’m not married and popping out babies. He doesn’t care about who I am or what I want in life. You can go back and tell him to drop the fake worry act. I didn’t believe it before, and I don’t believe it now.”
I spin once more and head down the path as the tears break free and careen down my cheeks in rivers. Reina doesn’t follow.
I reach The Sands in record time, wiping my face and hoping people will assume I’m just flushed from the morning heat, which is already making me sweat. It was hot in Austin, but this hot is different. It surrounds you like a fog anytime you step away from the ocean breeze.
The front desk lady solemnly informs me that there isn’t a single room available, and won’t be for weeks, but lets me sweet talk her into handing over the keys to a golf cart.
I sit on the vinyl seat, grateful for the shade of the roof, wondering what on earth to do next. While it’s true that my father blew his top and refused to fund my little island getaway, I’m by no means broke. I could rent myself a room somewhere and move on with my recovery—alone.
I don’t even know why I chose to come to this stupid island. I could have gone anywhere in the world. There must be a thousand tiny islands just like Faraday I could have chosen. Probably much cheaper ones. Did I really think that Dom was going to be a different person all these years later? That he would welcome me with open arms and be excited to hear about what I’d been up to in the years he missed?
I snort at the thought, shaking my head.
No, that wasn’t it. Sure, heading to Faraday was a questionablechoice, but when I needed somewhere safe to land, it was the first thing that came to mind. But the reason wasn’t Dom.
It was Sam.
I jam the keys into the ignition, decision made, but hesitate before clicking the cart on. I know where I want to go, who I want to be comforted by. But things between us have gotten more complicated over the last week. I’m no longer the blast from the past who he hooked up with one time on vacation. We’re teetering on the edge of stepping into ‘something more’ territory, even though neither of us understands how that could work.
Like Fran said, it’s not like you can have a secret relationship on this island. No one would be dumb enough to think that. The fact that we’ve gotten away with it for this long is amazing.
I grip the steering wheel hard as I consider my next move. I know what I want to do. I know that I don’t give a damn about furthering the damage to my already smoldering relationship with my brother. But I also know how Sam feels about it. He’s so sure that this thing between us will fracture his working relationship with his business partner, ruining a lifelong friendship. As a recent scandal survivor, I can certainly understand his hesitancy to burn his whole life to the ground. And, as a recent survivor of Dom’s wrath, I know that Sam’s probably right about how the whole thing will end up.
But there’s another side to this coin. There’s the side that becomes increasingly hard to ignore every time we’re together. It was lit up like a neon sign when he was in my hotel room yesterday.
“I get the feeling that you don’t always feel as strong and amazing as you portray yourself to be. As you are. But I see you, Naomi. And I know how amazing you are. So, if you forget, you can always come ask me.”
And that settles that.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Naomi
Reina pointed out the tiny road through the jungle that leads to Sam’s property the first time she took me to town, but that was apparently not enough information to find the place.
I spend nearly an hour going back and forth on the road I’m sure is the one she pointed to before I finally see the little turn off marked with a green wooden palm tree sign that leads down the next tiny jungle road.
I pause at the head of the driveway and try to gather myself a bit, not wanting to show up flustered and sweaty.
I want to get flustered and sweaty after I show up…
No. That’s not why I’m here. It might be a happy side effect of showing up, but the reason I came is to talk this over with the only person on the planet who knows enough to understand.
When I finally get up the nerve to pull my cart beside his, Sam’s standing on the porch, hands on his hips, grinning at me. My heart leaps and relief pours through me. I’m not sure where I got the idea that everyone’s always going to be disappointedwhen it’s me showing up, but it was probably my childhood where everyone was always disappointed it was me showing up. I’m always braced to smile in the face of their dismay.
“I was just about to come looking for you,” Sam calls as he comes down the steps toward where I parked. He gathers me out of the cart and into his arms and I swear to god I almost fall apart.
“What do you mean? How did you know I was coming?”
I glance up and watch his smile turn into a sly grin. “Reina called Fran, who called me. I called The Sands and learned about your golf cart heist.”
He’s holding me tightly as he says the words, his voice filled with kindness and humor and worry. I’m beside myself with the feeling of belonging. Something I’ve watched other people feel my whole life but never quite figured out for myself.
“The front desk lady was a total pushover.”