Page 113 of Our Deceptive Heat

I can stay away from them.

I can hide or I can run.

Hours pass, and I still haven’t come to a decision on what to do.

“You’re not planning on jumping, are you?”

I force a laugh, but it dies off quickly. “No. Not going to jump. Just thinking about escape, but there’s nowhere to go.”

Kelly moves to stand beside me. “When did Ryn Raines learn to hide?”

“Don’t you know, Kelly? I’ve always been hiding from something,” I say bitterly.

“Do you want me to chase them off the island?”

I hesitate. It’s tempting to let Kelly do my dirty work, but if he does, it is just a guarantee that I am, in fact, actually here. “No.”

“You might want to consider hearing them out.”

I whirl on him. “No, I don’t. I needed that out. I needed to escape, and they could have given me that. Instead, I have to hide and pretend I’m not who I am, and I can’t do what I love. How are you even asking me this again? I told you I’m not going to forgive them.”

“Okay. I don’t care if you forgive them or not, I’m just saying, you might want to cool your heels and just hear it so you have all the information-”

“Who’s side are you on?” I snarl. “Be on my side. Just once.”

“All right. I am on your side. We hate them. We’re hiding from them. Now what? You just going to do this pity party parlor trick thing forever?”

I narrow my eyes at him. “Raider is nicer than you.”

Kelly puts a hand on his chest. “Ahh, the pain, the pain. I’m dead.”

“Shut up.”

“Point of fact is, I’m not running or hiding from anyone out here. I’m refusing to do what they insist I do, and that’s different.”

“If that’s true, why don’t you have bonds with Gael and Ezy?”

Kelly bops my nose. “None of your business.”

I turn back to the ocean. “It hurts to look at them. It hurts to think about them.”

Kelly waits patiently with his hands in his pockets.

“I can’t forgive them.”

“Fine. don’t. Let’s go back and have dinner. Ezy wants you to play again.”

I turn and follow my cousin back down to the hotel.

I don’t see them.

I tell myself I’m happy about that.

For three weeks, Iavoid them. Kelly goes off to his surfing competitions and returns. I sit and read books and live a quiet life.

But when someone walks into a room, I expect it’s going to be them. When I walk around a corner, I expect to find them. Every person who speaks, for a moment, I think it’s them.

My nerves are shot.

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