Page 57 of Delirium

His icy blue eyes leveled me with a single glance, bright even in the dimming light of the room. “We always have choices, Nash. Surely you know that better than most.”

Whatever I was about to say was drowned out by Camp and Scarlett entering the room.

Scarlett looked back and forth between the two of us. “Don’t tell me you’ve been fighting in the two seconds you’ve been alone.”

“Nothing left to fight over, darling.” I met James’ gaze, daring him to say otherwise.

When he stayed silent, lips pressed into a tight line, I addressed the entire room. “So. Here’s the situation. I think it’s safe to assume James’ crew was there at some point. Exactly when they left, it’s hard to tell. It could’ve been a week ago. It could’ve been an hour ago. But they do not appear to have left willingly. So our choices are these—we can spend a few more days here, before the rains start, looking to see if they’ve gone anywhere, or we can continue downriver to our final destination. I’ll put it to a vote.”

Scarlett hesitated. “I don’t like the idea of leaving anyone behind. But...something really wasn’t right about that place. What happens if we start searching, and one of us gets hurt, and then we’re in an even worse situation than we were before? It’s a big risk for a maybe, even for me.”

“I agree.” Camp nodded. “I don’t know what they did to that place, but forever isn’t long enough for me to stay away from there. If it were up to me, we’d be sailing at night just to get away.”

The votes didn’t surprise me. I agreed completely with Scarlett. While it felt wrong to leave anyone behind, we also had to think of the safety of our own tiny crew. “James? They’re your people, after all. You have a say, too.”

He shrugged, too casual for the situation. I expected anger, fury, some kind of big emotion. Not nonchalance. “They aren’t there. Clancy isn’t there. My money isn’t there. If they’ve run off with my money, I don’t really want to be trekking around a goddamn jungle to save their sorry asses. They’ve made their beds.”

A bead of sweat trickled down James’ forehead, distracting me as he spoke. “So we’re unanimous then. We leave at first light tomorrow. I’d leave tonight, but…” I glanced out the window at the dying light of the day. “Dark will be coming soon. We’d only make it a couple of miles downriver. No point in wasting the fuel starting her up for that.”

I couldn’t deny the small burst of relief that flooded through me. I really didn’t want to go back to the city if we could help it. But if they’d all agreed to go back and look, I would’ve gone back with them.

Of course I would’ve.

“Well, if that’s decided, everyone get some food, and get some sleep. We’ll be off tomorrow.” I clapped my hands together, and everyone got to their feet.

Camp and James left without another word, but Scarlett lingered before walking out the door, standing in front of me, pushing her tousled hair away from her face nervously.

“I don’t like it, Nash,” she whispered. “I don’t like it at all.”

I stood and rested my hands on her shoulders. “Hey, it’s okay. It’s all good. We’ve left now. We don’t have to go back. We’ll be on our way tomorrow. You know what, I think I might even be able to squeeze one more real adventure out of this trip. There’s a cave I like to show people a few miles down.” My smiled felt forced, fake, and the words tasted stale in my mouth.

She shook her head. “That’s not what I mean, and you know it. Don’t you feel it, too? The energy there, in the city, it followed us back. Don’t tell me you don’t feel it.”

A choice was laid out in front of me. Tell the truth and confirm Scarlett’s fears, or lie and have her know I was lying.

I chickened out, choosing neither. “Darling, you’ll be okay, I promise.”

Her eyes were filled with questions as she looked up at me, wrapping her arms around herself with a small shiver. “I hope you’re right. I really really do.”

She drifted out of my arms, away, away, away, a dream brought to life. I hesitated. “Do you…do you want some company? I can come to your cabin if you don’t want to be alone.”

Scarlett smiled, shivering again. “Thank you. But it’s okay. I think I just need to be by myself and process for a bit. I’ll come find you later, okay?”

She exited the room, leaving me alone once more. I fell back in my chair, wondering if I’d said the right things or if every word I spoke was completely and utterly wrong.

I used to be a people person. Once upon a time. Before I’d spent more time withCarpe Diemthan with humans.

I was good in the rainforest. Good with animals. Maybe I wasn’t good with people anymore, but I was good with facing danger, and finding ways out of it.

Which was what made the sinking pit in my stomach all the more uncomfortable. For the first time, I had people on my boat that I cared about outside of just being my passengers.

And there was a strong chance I wouldn’t be able to find a way out of all this danger lurking behind the beauty.

Night fell quickly,covering theCarpe Diemin a shroud. I tried not to think about the way it reminded me of a coffin, slowly smothering us while we sank into the ground, still alive.

I was being overdramatic.

Having not seen anyone since our meeting in the mess hall, I assumed them all to be fast asleep in their cabins—as I should be. Instead, I found the confines of my cabin suffocating, the closed door trapping me inside a cage whose bars slowly shrank around me. I’d wandered outside, looking for relief in the open air.

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