Page 70 of Delirium

“Well…” He hesitated. “A lot of things out here can cause delusion and hallucinations. But they’re usually edible, and I can’t imagine any of us picking some random mushroom up and stuffing it in our mouths. Which leaves us with diseases. I wasn’t sure at first, but when I saw James sweating, I had my assumptions. You were on fire last night, too, Scarlett. And then you mentioned James’ dream, and combined how with Camp is acting today…”

I shot a glare at Scarlett. Had she actually spilled my embarrassing secret that quickly? She mouthed an apology over her shoulder.

“Just spit it out, Nash. What do you think the problem is?”

“Malaria. I think we all have malaria. It’s transmitted via mosquitoes. All the symptoms add up, the weird dreams, the hallucinations, the way we’re all sweating, all exhausted.” He paused with a grimace. “There’s a cure.”

“But?” I snapped. “I’m assuming there’s a but here by your expression, and I really don’t know if I want to hear it.”

“I’m all out of the meds needed to treat it. I needed to restock when I docked for the season, and seeing as I thought this would be a quick trip, I didn’t bother. Added to the fact I couldn’t get the motor working, and well…we seem to be in a bit of a predicament.”

“You couldn’t get the boat started?” Scarlett’s voice was calm, but more dangerous than I’ve ever heard it. “How the hell are we going to get this medication then?”

Nash ran a hand through his hair, shifting his weight from side to side. “Like I said this morning. We hike. I have all the gear. It should only be a couple days at most until we find a village with enough supplies to give us a hand.”

She blinked, dropping Camp’s face to cross the hall and stand in front of Nash. “You think we can hike in this state? It’s bad enough Camp thought James fucking killed you in a contained environment. What do you think it’s going to be like out there in the rainforest? How are we going to stay safe?”

“Darling, I don’t think we have a choice.” Nash looked around at each of us. “We can stay and wait for rescue, but it’s iffy at this time of year. Nobody wants to chance the rainy season. Or we can make a move and try to save ourselves. I know what my choice is. I’m going to get packed up, and be ready to move out at first light tomorrow.”

Scarlett pressed her fingers into her eyes. “This isn’t happening. This can’t be happening. I just wanted an adventure. Not this nightmare.”

“Do you think we’re cursed?” For the first time since we’d all begun arguing, Camp spoke up. “I know curses are stupid and not real and whatever else, but do you think we were cursed stepping into that city and this is our punishment?”

“Curses aren’t real.” I left no room for argument in my voice. “I don’t care how weird that city was, or why Clancy wasn’t there, or why my workers were missing, but I’m sure they have a damn good, logical, reason. Everything else is just shit bad luck.”

I didn’t miss the quiet look Scarlett shot me, the one that said she wasn’t buying it.

“We stay here and hope for the best, and hope none of us get sicker in the meantime, or we hike it out,” Nash repeated.

I was over the back and forth. I was over theCarpe Diem. I was over this goddamn rainforest, jungle, whatever the fuck you wanted to call it. “There isn’t an option. You said yourself, it might be weeks before someone comes. None of us can trust our senses anymore. We need to get out of here, as soon as we can. We hike out tomorrow. I don’t like it any more than any of you do, but we don’t have a choice.” I looked around at everyone, waiting to see if anyone argued with me, but I only saw resolved expressions, and firm nods.

“Everyone, pack your shit. Pack lightly, only the essentials, because you’re going to have to carry whatever you bring. We’re moving out at first light. I’ll grab the tent and other supplies out of storage.” Nash jerked his head toward me. “Want to give me a hand?”

I hesitated for a moment, wondering if this was some kind of trap. But this was Nash. As contentious as our relationship was, he wouldn’t try to make things worse. “Yeah.”

“You guys good?” he asked Scarlett.

She nodded, and he gestured for me to follow him.

The small room overflowed with random gear and boxes, exactly how I thought the inside of Nash’s head would look like. I picked up a random rock, perfectly smooth and round, wondering what the significance could be.

“Heads up.” Nash tossed a thin sleeping bag across the room at me, and then another. Two more followed, and then he appeared through the shambles carrying a tent that looked far too small to fit all of us, and a clanging bag of pots and pans. “I’ll get up early in the morning and get the food ready, but this should be good enough to get us out.”

I raised my brow, staring at the thin tent bag, barely longer than my forearm. “Are you sure that’s a four-person tent?”

Nash laughed. “Haven’t you ever seen a hiking tent before? I promise, it might be a bit snug, but it’ll fit all of us.”

Great. Exactly what I needed, to be cuddled up next to the fucking lovesick puppies, inches away from their infatuation. Sounded exactly like my idea of a good time. I looked away, not wanting to picture it anymore.

“I wanted to talk to you.” I couldn’t avoid the conversation any longer, not if we were all going to be stuffed like sardines into the tiny ass tent he held.

“Okay.” He leaned against a stack of boxes, dropping the tent at his feet. “Talk. You have my full attention.”

“I’m sorry for what happened. At the waterfall. I was angry, and I was…” I trailed off, not wanting to say what came next. The word was lodged in my heart, immovable as a boulder.

“Jealous,” Nash finished.

I shot him a glare, and then sighed. “Fine. Yes. I was jealous.” I really didn’t like the way the word felt in my mouth. It didn’t fit, leaving a scar I’d rather not acknowledge. “I was jealous she looked at you that way, that she trusted you enough to touch her. I was so fucking jealous I couldn’t see straight. But as much as we’ve had our problems, it really wasn’t right of me to say what I said. It wasn’t my place. And I’m…”

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