“Sorry.” Nash shrugged, giving me a crooked grin, the one that drew the girls in when we were young, before life hit us hard. “It’s okay. Really. I was pissed when it first happened, but it felt good to get it out in the open.”
I blinked. “You’re over it just like that?”
Nash laughed. “Would you rather I be like you, and held a grudge for the next century? Not my style. There’s no point letting something weigh me down when it doesn’t need to.” He clapped a hand on my shoulder, the sudden touch surprising me, and for the first time in a decade I looked into his eyes. I found no malice there, only honesty. “Look. James. You did a shitty thing. It’s in the past now. And, you know what? I understand why you did it. I was jealous, too, before. All those times I saw her with Camp, it felt like my heart was going to explode. What I’ll tell you is this—don’t ruin something good by being afraid of the consequences. Let your walls down for once in your life.”
I knew he was right. But fuck. Those walls were there for a reason.
“Don’t risk your destiny for your dignity. It’s not worth it. It never was.” With one last smile, Nash picked up the tent and left the room, but not before calling over his shoulder, “Don’t forget those sleeping bags while you’re pining!”
I flipped him off behind his back. Always a jerk.
One sleeping bag got placed in front of each door, and then I disappeared into my room to narrow down my life. I dumped out my bag on the bed. Obviously, the paperwork didn’t need to come. It felt wrong leaving it, but what good would it do?
Was I really pining?
It didn’t take me long to shove a few shirts and pants into my bag, and anything else I deemed important.
Was that why Scarlett kept her distance? Because she thought I was too worried about my dignity?
Night fell quickly, until only the orange bulb of my room lit my space. I was as ready as I could be, but there was no way I could sleep. I had too much on my mind. I needed room to breathe.
I wandered outside, finding my way to one of the benches that lined the deck. I had gotten used to the sweating, so the heat was almost welcoming when the sun went down. The moon still hung high in the sky, illuminating the world around me. Backlit clouds crowded the dome of nighttime, and I knew it wouldn’t be long before the rain started. I should have gone back inside before I got soaked, but I couldn’t bring myself to leave.
I couldn’t trust my senses, and yet I had to trust my gut. Is this how everyone felt? Falling?
A growl pierced the night air, calling all my attention, followed by a sharp scream. I knew that scream.
“Scarlett!” I called, jumping off the bench and racing around the deck. I knew it was stupid to be docked here for so long. We were too close to the shore. Something had jumped on board and attacked her.Fuck. I demanded my feet to move quicker, faster, even though it felt like I was slogging through quicksand. “Scarlett!”
I rounded the corner that sat closest to the shoreline, my heart racing at what I might fight on the other side. Scarlett, being mauled to death by a jaguar as dark as the night. Scarlett, bleeding out in front of me. Scarlett, dead. No. No. No.
But as I rounded the corner, I stopped dead in my tracks. Nothing was there. The deck was completely empty. No. Fuck. I couldn’t be too late.
This was my fate for not telling her how I felt sooner, for not falling into her open arms. Something had stolen her in the night, she’d screamed for help, and I was too late. As if the universe knew my pain, the skies opened up, and the rains poured down.
“Scarlett!” I screamed, voice raw, wiping the pouring rain from my eyes. “Scarlett!”
My voice echoed back at me, over and over again, sounding more in pain each time it called back.Scarlett. Scarlett. Scarlett.The rain poured, and my broken heart screamed back to me. The water hitting the deck turned to steam in the humid air, filling the night with the thick scent of rotting wood. Something else, darker, much darker, overlaid this smell, almost like the iron tang of blood.Blood.
No. There was no way I smelled blood. The rainforest had to be playing tricks on my senses.
Except...
“James?”
I turned and she was there, standing in front of me, rubbing her eyes. She stood in front of me in nothing more than an oversized shirt, slowly soaking through. The fabric clung to every curve on her body, the moon shining down, making her look positively ethereal.
“You’re okay.” Relief was heavy in my voice.
She looked up at the sky. “You know it’s raining, right?”
Don’t risk your destiny for your dignity.
I didn’t think. I just did. I crossed the deck in three steps, pulled her to me, and pressed my lips onto hers.
Chapter
Twenty-Five