Page 102 of She Was Made for Me

I lift a shoulder. “It doesn’t matter. That’s not how love works.”

“Look,” Dad says, his tone one of exaggerated patience, “just because you’ve developed a little crush on—”

“That’s not what it is!” I cut in fiercely.

“Oh for God’s sake,” Mom interjects, shoving Dad aside until she appears on the screen beside him. “You’re being ridiculous, Richard. I was younger than Violet is now when I married you, when I gave birth to her. She’s old enough to know how she feels.”

“Mom’s right.” I give her a shaky, grateful smile. “We fell in love. We were planning a future together. He had this idea to start a business restoring old buildings, and we were going to work together, like we had at the house. Honestly, Dad…” I shake my head in frustration. “I know I’myourchild, but I’m notachild anymore. I know my own mind, my own heart.”

Dad rubs his chin in thought, his hand scratching the five o’clock shadow. He glances from Mom to me, and eventually lets out a long sigh. “I guess you’re right. I’ll always see you as my little girl, but it’s true, you’re not little anymore. Even Kyle said that.”

Just hearing his name from Dad’s mouth is enough for my eyes to well again. “I’ve never been happier than I was with him.”

“Not even at the new job?” Mom asks.

“No. I should be, because it’s perfect, but I’m not. I miss Kyle. I miss Sadie. I miss you. I miss New York.” The words come tumbling out in a rush and I don’t even try to stop them. “I wish I’d never come back here. I wish I’d told you about me and Kyle, that I’d stayed and we’d made things work.” Then I flop back in my chair, limp with relief. For the first time in a month, I feel lighter, unburdened, because I’ve admitted the truth. Not only to Dad, but to myself.

“You know, I’ve never seen Kyle as happy as he was working on the house,” Dad admits quietly. He chuckles to himself. “I didn’t think much of it until he told me he’d met someone, but I certainly didn’t think it was you. Now I understand.”

My heart squeezes. Would Kyle forgive me if I went to him and apologized for running away to the West Coast, instead of telling Dad and fighting for us? He was so calm and accepting when I told him I couldn’t go through with it. He almost seemed relieved. Maybe he was glad that it hadn’t gone any further. Maybe he’s moved on with his life and is happier without the drama.

A notification pops up on my computer screen, bringing my mind back to work. I have so much to do, and I probably shouldn’t be wasting time on this call, but I can’t bring myself to care.

“Did you mean what you said?” Dad asks gently. “About wishing you’d never left the city?”

I nod.

“Then will you come back?”

I chew on my lip, unsure how to respond. “I want to, Dad. But without Kyle…” I sigh. “And what would I do for work? How would I—”

“One thing at a time,” Mom assures me. “You can figure the rest out when you get here.”

“Maybe. I don’t know if it’s the right thing to do.”

“You said you know your own heart,” Dad reminds me. “What is it telling you?”

That’s easy. It’s the thing I’ve been ignoring all month now, since I got back to Silicon Valley.

“To go home.”

“Then come home,” Dad says softly.

“Do you want us to come get you?” Mom offers, and I shake my head.

“No. I’ll work my two weeks notice and pack up my apartment.”

“Are you sure?” Dad’s brow crinkles with concern. “We could easily get a flight—”

“Thanks, Dad, but I need to do this on my own.”

My heart beats harder at the thought of moving back to the city, and that’s how I know it’s the right move. Maybe I won’t get to be with Kyle, maybe it’s all too hard after everything we’ve been through, maybe I hurt him too much and he won’t want to try again, and I’d understand.

With or without him, I realize, I don’t belong here. I belong in New York. I belong near my family, near Sadie, in the city that makes me feel alive. No job is worth giving up all the best things in life. Not even this one.

I let out a long breath, feeling the first tentative shoots of hope unfurl. I don’t have any plans, any idea of what I’ll do once I get there, but I have to try. I want a life that’s more than work, and I have Kyle to thank for realizing that.

Who are you when you’re not working?he once asked me.

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