Page 33 of I'll Keep Her Safe

Brittany lifted her gaze to the ceiling in a dramatic show of exasperation. “It’s not that big a deal.”

“Not a big deal?” My blood boiled. “Is that a fucking joke? I have adaughter. I deserve to know that, to know her, to be in her life.”

Brittany looked like she was about to protest, and I stepped forward, speaking through gritted teeth. “Iwillbe in her life, Brittany. I’m her father.” Saying the words made the reality of the situation hit me all over again, and I let out a shuddering breath. “I have a right to know my daughter. How could you not tell me?”

She glared at me. “Why do you even care? You spent all your time riding your bike and working.”

I’d felt a flicker of shame then because that’s exactly what I was still doing, at thirty-two.

“I want to know my daughter,” I’d insisted again, and Brittany shook her head.

“We’re doing fine without you.” Then she’d turned for the door, as if she was going to leave, and I’d panicked. I didn’t know her last name, or where she lived. In my mind, if she’d left that day, there was a chance I’d never see either of them again.

And I couldn’t let that happen.

“Wait.” I grabbed her arm, and she glanced back at me impatiently. “Please. I want to be in her life.”

Brittany tugged her arm free. “What if we don’twantyou in our lives?”

Her words felt like a punch to the stomach. Yes, I’d been immature when we hooked up, but I didn’t deserve that.

“Isn’t she curious about who her dad is?” I asked. “Doesn’t she want to know?”

Brittany shrugged again. That was getting fucking annoying.

“I told her you didn’t want to be in her life. It was easier.”

“Easier for who?” I spat back.

She sighed, glancing at the door again. “Look, Wyatt—”

“Fine,” I blurted. “Let her believe that. I’ll be the bad guy. But… you have to let me into her life now. Please.”

So that’s what I did. I let Bailey believe I’d chosen not to be there for half of her life, to get what little time we did have left. To keep the peace. Besides, I’d reasoned, I didn’t want to ruin her relationship with her mom. For Bailey’s sake, not Brittany’s.

But it changed me. Ever since that day in Walgreens, I’ve felt the need to prove myself, both to Bailey and her mom. To prove I wasn’t the irresponsible guy Brittany thought I was, that I could be a good dad. That she should have told me. It wasn’t a conscious choice, more like a habit I slipped into. It took me a while to realize, but now it’s clear. It’s why I don’t ride my bike anymore, why I continue to grow my company when it hasn't felt right for a while now.

I look at Poppy, staring at me in shock, and sigh.

“It’s a long story, but… let’s just say that Bailey’s mom can be… difficult.”

Poppy nods. “I know. I’ve met her.”

This helps, actually, and my lips curve in a rueful smile. “I ran into them in a Walgreens and that’s how I found out. I saw her with Bailey. We agreed that if they let me into their lives, I couldn’t tell Bailey that her mom intentionally left me in the dark.” I grimace, feeling stupid. Saying these words aloud makes me look like a coward, a doormat, but it didn’t feel that way at the time. At the time, it felt like the only way I could get to know my daughter.

“That’s…” Poppy shakes her head slowly, as if computing something I’m unaware of. “That’s so unfair. It makes you look like the bad guy.”

I lift a shoulder. “I’m used to it,” I mutter, and she frowns.

“That doesn’t make it acceptable.” Her gaze holds mine, fierce and angry, and it soothes something in my chest. How wonderful it is to have someone onmyside for once. Someone who knows the truth and thinks it’s every bit as unreasonable as I do. It’s a balm I didn’t know I needed, but I force the comforting feeling away. She’s Bailey’s friend, which means she can never be mine—friend or otherwise.

I sigh, shifting on the sofa so the heating pad hits a different spot. “It doesn’t matter. It was a long time ago.”

Poppy chews thoughtfully on her lip. “I disagree. It’s the entire foundation of your relationship with Bailey. She deserves to know the truth.”

I consider this. “What’s the point? We get along great now. Besides, as much as I dislike Brittany, I don’t want to throw her under the bus. I don’t want Bailey to hate her mom.”

“But…” Poppy looks indignant. “You deserve to be free of that lie.”