Page 63 of Rival Hearts

“No, you’re not.” Trent didn’t miss a beat.

“I am. I put the sequence of events together. Too late, sure. But the timeline matches when he came to the house and I was there. I was in the middle of writing a song in the garage, and I didn’t pay attention to what he was doing.”

“Dickhead Dan had been in and out of our house all week. I’d told him where the spare key was one time when we were drunk. Maybe you let him in, and maybe he got some of the notebooks and other shit that night that he hadn’t gotten before. But he would have gotten it either way. I was too confident. Left too much in my room not locked up.”

I sank into the beanbag chair and stared at Trent. “I ran into Dan the other day at the gas station and he—he made it seem like I was at fault.”

Trent shrugged. “Like I said, maybe he did get some of it that night. But he was there a lot after he got flipped by the copstrying to cover his ass and bury mine. I asked around. Lots of people talking once it had been six years and I was out of jail. Nothing for people to lose anymore. Dan was a snake, and I didn’t see it. How could you?”

“Christ, Trent. I’ve blamed myself for years.”

“You shoulda talked to me, shoulda asked me.” He sat forward and put his forearms on his knees. “But here’s the thing. Even if thatiswhat happened, what happened to me still wouldn’t be your fault. Did you know I was cooking meth? That I’d built myself a little empire? Did you let him in knowing he was going to nail me in court?”

I shook my head and dragged a hand down my face. “Not a fucking clue. In hindsight, I should have known something was up.”

“You sound like Maggie.” Trent smirked and scanned my face. A few beats passed between us. “She the other reason we’re not tight anymore?”

Easing deeper into my chair, I drew one foot across my knee and gave a curt nod without looking at Trent. “I think so, yeah.”

“Were you fucking her when she was supposedly my girlfriend?”

Trent’s gaze was on me like hot coals. “The night you got arrested.” I shifted uncomfortably in my chair. “I could give you all kinds of excuses—I was drunk; she told me you two weren’t really together; I’d been half in love with her for months. But none of them make what happened better, and I know that.”

“I’ve been trying to wrap my head around this one.” He made a whirling motion beside his temple with his index finger. “I knew you liked her. It was clear as fucking day to me from the way you looked at her and teased her. I’m not sure she saw it, not really. But I did. And I could have told you what was going on between her and me, let you two work out whatever was brewing.” Trent ran a hand along the top of his head and didn’t meet my gaze.“I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about this the last few weeks ’cause I’ve been so angry with you. Just”—he made a filling-up gesture near his chest—“so mad.”

“I let you down.”

“Yeah, you did.” He hesitated. “Being with Maggie was the only time in my life where I had something you wanted. You know? Mom was all happy I’d finally brought home a good girl, and you were impressed too. I could see it. The first time you and Maggie went off about some book you’d read, I was proud she was my girlfriend, and you found her interesting.”

He swallowed, not sure what to say. He had found her interesting, fascinating, and that fixation had doomed them.

“I guess if I’m honest, me not telling you was as much of a problem as you not telling me. You get what I’m saying?”

“Whydidn’tyou tell me?” I didn’t know what I would have done with the information. Would it have made me bolder sooner? Or would I have stayed away at all costs? What I’d felt for her had consumed me, and at twenty-one, I probably wouldn’t have had the sense to keep my distance.

“You were the smart one. Even now, you make fun of me for being a high school senior for two years.”

A wave of shame washed over me. My teasing had bothered Trent? Ithadtaken him two years. I figured it was because Trent didn’t apply himself. Who wouldn’t give their brother a hassle when the only thing holding them back was laziness and a lack of drive?

“The one thing Mom was always on me about was getting my diploma. And I couldn’t get it, not without help. I thought I wasn’t smart enough.”

“I don’t know why you’d think that,” I said. “Ineverthought that.”

Trent shrugged. Silence coated the room for a moment. “I couldn’t read.”

With a frown, I rocked forward in my chair. “Fuck off.” I reached back into my memories, trying to recall when I’d seen Trent read something, anything when we’d been younger. “Doesn’t make any sense.” He must have read something, right? People couldn’t get along in life without being able to read.

“Couldn’t read past a grade two level as a senior in high school. The guidance counselor caught on toward the start of my second attempt at graduating.”

He couldn’t read? The revelation was stunning. “How does Maggie fit in?” Had she done his schoolwork for him? Maggie as a cheater didn’t sit right. I knew her now, really knew her. She wouldn’t have done Trent’s work for him.

“I was pissed about the guidance counselor telling me I’d probably never get all my credits or pass my exams if I couldn’t read properly. I went to a party and got really fucking drunk. She was there, end of her junior year, getting bullied by this group of junior fuckwits. They’d been making her life miserable for a while, I guess. She hadn’t told anyone. Tried to handle the abuse on her own, and it was getting a lot worse. She’s one of the best people I know, but it took her a long time to stand up for herself.”

“You stepped in and helped her?” I rubbed the center of my chest. People had been hurting Maggie? A few short months ago, I’d been so hell-bent on making her pay for all of my wrong perceptions. Ludicrous. Pay for what? Being a good person? It was a miracle she was still talking to me at all.

He laughed. “Not quite. She stormed out of the party, and I followed her out and gave her a cigarette.”

“She smoked it?”

---