Page 43 of Mending Hearts

“I’ll call and tell them. That’s ridiculous. They need better health and safety standards if they’re giving you food poisoning.” Laura slipped the full glass of water onto the nightstand and settled next to me on the bed. She tucked the covers around in a way she hadn’t done since I was little. She scanned my face, thoughtful. “You know I love you, right?”

For a beat, I stared back at her and then nodded.

“Tyler’s a lot older than you.”

Every muscle in my body tightened. As though I hadn’t been surrounded by men much older all my life, as though age had mattered so much to her when she’d left me alone with those men. Those terrible men. And there was nothing terrible about Tyler.

“Your point?”

“You need to be careful. You’ve worked hard to get this far in your career. Throwing it away for a man…”

“I never said that. When have I said that?”

“There has to be something behind this insistence on going to Little Falls. He owns a store there, doesn’t he? Some sort of thrift shop?”

The disdain in her voice caused me to bristle for Tyler. “There’s nothing wrong with owning a thrift shop.”

“He’s done a good job on the tour so far, but he can’t stay. If he’s a distraction for you, he can’t stay. I’m sorry.”

“You’re not sorry. You live for this shit.” I sat up and pulled my knees into my chest. “I tell you I’m sick and Tyler helped me, and your response is to fire him? You understand how crazy that is, right? Is this because he wouldn’t sleep with you?”

“It’s because I think he wants to sleep with you.”

“As if you care.” I glared at her. “You’ve made this,” I gestured down my body, “literally and figuratively.” I threw out my hands. “So what if he wants to sleep with me? That’s what you created, Mother. Mia Malone—girls want to be me; guys want to bewithme. Wasn’t that what you all agreed in the marketing meeting when I was fourteen? I was fourteen and you were already talking about men wanting to fuck me.”

“You’re only twenty now—”

“I’ll be twenty-one soon. I don’t know why you think my age matters. I’m legally able to have sex in all fifty states.” I met her gaze, every revelation and secret sitting between us. “We both know I’m no virgin.”

Laura stretched to her full height while still staying perched on her bed. “It’s not about sex. What have I always told you?”

I swallowed, and my hand strayed to the side of my stomach under the covers. “That love makes you do stupid things. That it’s not worth the hassle.”

“You’ve never let another man into your life like this.”

I could feel her focused attention, but I wouldn’t meet it. I didn’t love Tyler, probably wasn’t capable of love, anyway.

“Twenty or twenty-one is too young for forever, so he’s a distraction. Possibly a mistake, a really costly one. I don’t regret having you, Mia. You know that. But I don’t want that life for you.”

“I won’t make the same mistakes as you.” I met her stare head-on, my chin tilted in defiance. When my mind tried to slip toward thoughts of the baby, I slammed the mental door. The baby wasn’t mine. It was Tyler’s, so I wouldn’t ever have my mother’s life of regret. “I want a break from work. A break. I’m not quitting. I’m not running off to get married. I want to go write songs in Little Falls with Grady Castillo, who is a super talented writer.” I took a deep breath and doubled down. “If you fire Tyler, I’ll be taking a break from you, too.”

In the half-light, Laura’s eyebrows rose. “Don’t be an idiot.”

I quit.

I quit.

I quit.

The words sat on my tongue, but I didn’t have the guts to say them, even though seeing the expression on her face would almost be worthit. Laura would talk me out of abandoning everything, convince me to tough it out. Deep down, I wanted this whole situation to go away, and it was easier to pretend the baby didn’t exist. Not that I could do that for much longer.

No, I needed to get Taryn and Rebecca to deliver the blow about the tour.

As much as I wanted to avoid thinking about the baby growing inside me, last night had proven I wasn’t willing to put myself first anymore. Seeing the blood should have been a relief. A miscarriage would solve everything. But that hadn’t been how I’d felt. Tyler would have been really upset if I lost the baby; I didn’t want to disappoint him.

Beyond all that, he didn’t deserve to be painted as a villain in whatever narrative Mom was writing in her head.

“He’s not like the others. He’s not going to hurt me. I won’t let you fire him. Don’t make me choose.”

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