Page 11 of Bullet

"It's alright, Pop Pop."

"No, it's not. I shouldn't have allowed my ego to interfere with our relationship. You come before money and business. I know it means nothing now because, at any moment, my number is up."

I kissed his hand before I wiped my own tears away. "Pop Pop, no worries. It's all water under the bridge now. All that matters right now is you."

"You forgave him so easily. What about me?" Daddy quizzed from his place on the other side of the bed. "Are you gonna introduce me to my granddaughter?"

My eyes snapped to him. "Don't do that, Daddy. Please don't make it seem like you care about me or her. The point of the matter is, I came here for Pop Pop, not you."

"Damn. Not my own daughter talkin' to me like I ain't shit. Like I'm not the nigga who gave you life."

"That's all you did! You didn't love me, care for me, or protect me like you should've. I'm the bane of your existence, remember. You hate you had me, remember?"

"I made a mistake. Why can't you let it go and forgive me?"

"It ain't that easy, nigga!" I spat with my chest. I mugged him, and he mugged me back.

"Time out! That's enough, got dammit," Mama interjected from behind me with my brothers behind her. "Melvin, I didn't bring Crystal back so that you can chastise her like she's a child."

"Well, she's acting like it!"

"Mommy, I'm scared," Clear cried and reached for me.

"Oh no. I'm so sorry, baby boo." I scooped her up and cradled her to my chest. "I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have yelled in front of you." She cried on my chest, and I rubbed her back soothingly. "I'm sorry y'all. This was a mistake. We're not leaving, just going to a hotel. Clear is not used to arguing and fighting."

"I don't care. You ain't been here a day, and already you got shit going. Take that little mutt of yours and leave. I didn't ask you to come!" Daddy hollered.

"Bitch!" Before I knew it, I handed Clear off to Marshawn and grabbed Pop Pop's tin bathroom basin. With lightning speed, I ran over to his side and beat his ass with that pan. I popped him across his jaw, and his head snapped to the side. Them licks kept coming across his jaw, his head, and his chin until my brothers pulled me off him. "You talk to them hos like that you've been entertaining. My child was brought here with real love. Something your heartless ass will know nothing about. I'm done with you. I no longer give a damn what happens to you. I don't have a father! Let me go!" I walked past my brothers and grabbed Clear, and then we left. "Bitch ass nigga."

"Mm. Mommy, this mac and cheese is good," Clear sang with her face covered in cheese sauce.

My mama swallowed and laughed. "Our big girl knows good food."

"Yes, she does. I'm glad you like it, Little Clear. This used to be my favorite restaurant when I was your age, and now."

We were at Luke's Place, my favorite Southern cuisine restaurant. No other restaurant made soul food like them. You could taste the love in every spoonful. The place was crowdedper usual, and the laughter from a group of businessmen's tables overreached our seats. I only looked over there briefly. They appeared to be in some kind of business meeting, but they ordered food and drinks from left to right. They weren't the only ones having a time.

I looked at my Little Clear, and she danced in her seat after every bite. Clear had small portions of mac and cheese, cornbread, yams, and chicken nuggets. My baby was not a picky eater. She didn't play about food. I laughed to myself because she got it from me. Food and I went together real bad.

After the incident with Daddy two days ago, Clear and I stayed at one of the best hotels in Decatur. I couldn't be in the vicinity of him, let alone in the same house. I blacked out when he called my baby a mutt. Clear had never seen me crash out like that before. It probably won't be the last time, but it won't be anytime soon. When it came to her well-being, I'd crash out every damn time. Clear was the sweetest little girl and deserved to be treated with respect and love like the next child.

My mama's voice pulled me from my thoughts. "I've been cleaning and packing up your Pop Pop's things lately. I would like it if you came by to help me. He has a lot of old journals and ledgers from generations that you can look at to get a better sense of who he was. There are a ton of old family albums as well. Don't worry about your father. He'll be out and staying clear until we're done. What do you say?"

I nodded, then swallowed. "If he won't be around, then count us in. That man still got me hot. Let me order a little something to take the edge off."

"Me too," Mama agreed.

We laughed as we looked over the drink menu. I was surely a wine girlie. Grandma Tula and I had shared many bottles together. I couldn't wait to get back to them.

My eyes traveled over the wine list, then over to the bourbon list. I paused when I saw an asterisk by a new bourbon called Crystal Bullet. My fingers shakily rubbed over the words.Was this a drink named after me and my love?

"Mama?"

"Yeah, honey?" She didn't look at me while she looked over her drink menu.

"What's Crystal Bullet Bourbon?"

This time, she looked up at me with a small smile. "If it's what you're thinking, then it's true. Yes, Bullet created a bourbon and named it after you."

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