Page 155 of Corrupt Me

“I can hear your thinking, Bailey.”

“And what do you think I am thinking?” I snap, suddenly angry at him.

“You’re pissed at me?” he asks, sounding contrite.

“What was that, Hunter?”

He avoids looking at me. We’re a total mess. I don’t know how to fix us.

“You want to fuck me out of your system?”

His hard gaze pins me. “I could fuck you for the rest of my damn life, and I wouldn’t be able to fuck you out of my system. You’re embedded in my life’s fabric.” He digs a finger into his temple, his expression tortured. “Ruling every thought.”

He slams his palm against his chest. “Owning every heartbeat.”

He shakes his head as if trying to clear his thoughts. “I desperately wanted to fuck myself into you, not myself out of you, angel…”

I sniffle, the pain he emanates killing me softly. “You’re mad at me. Admit it.”

The sigh he emanates is soul-crushing. “I am. That doesn’t mean I don’t love you with everything in me.”

“Good, but if you ever try to hide from me again when you’re balls deep inside of me, I am going to bite your dick off. I am yours and you are mine. Got it?”

“I love when my kitten shows her claws,” he says, forcing some cheer into the moment.

“Nope. You won’t distract me by pretending we’re okay. We’re not.”

His chest pants with a heavy breath. “This is killing me.”

I take his hands in mine, wanting to erase the distance. “Tell me. Talk to me. Please.”

“I’d rather be dead than stay away from you. You want the truth? Can you handle it?”

No, I don’t think I can. I still need to hear it, though.

He shuts his eyes for a moment, but he can’t hide his anguish from me. “I am unstable. I can’t find my place. I can’t fucking sleep. Every muscle in my body aches, starting with the one that is only yours. I am going through the motions. I am back to gray because the rainbow in my life is so near, yet so far from me. I am lost. Is that what you want to hear? That I am a fucking lost man without you?”

What is there to say to that? I can’t make it better. Not even that hard fuck helped him. Doubts take over, and I hug myself, knowing I can’t do a thing to ease him. That hurts the most. I am not his peace—I have always been his chaos.

Even though there’s some space between our bodies, an invisible thread binds us together, firmly wrapped around our hearts. A continent could separate us, but our souls wouldn’t perceive the distance.

“Nope, kitten. I stripped myself bare for you. Your turn. Talk to me,” he insists.

“You’re regretting falling in love, right? Because without you loving me, you would be all right.”

He cages me in, his palms resting on each side of my face. “Bloody hell, Bailey.”

“Just admit it.”

He splays his palms, cupping each side of my face as he leans in, resting his forehead on mine.

“I can’t admit it because it would be a lie. Stop thinking this shit.” He inhales deeply. “The only right thing in my life is your love. Loving you is the truth of my life.”

“You’re not there and when you’re not there, I am lost too,” I confess.

He lifts me off the ground, my legs and arms crossing around his back and neck. If I could embed myself into him, I would. We’re like yin and yang; we come only in pairs.

In his arms, I whisper, “I don’t want the distance. I can’t bear it… I don’t think I will survive it intact if you’re cold toward me.”

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