Page 41 of Possess

“Nonsense.” She snatched the can. “I’m fine.” Allyson took a drink. Zeke was still standing, staring at her. “Sit down, Zeke. Haven’t you ever seen a woman drink out of can before?” His bemused expression made her smile.

“No, unless it’s family.”

She laughed. “I don’t need a glass to enjoy a soda. Besides, we’re friends having a nice casual lunch.”

“Yes, we’re friends.” His heart warmed at his words. He took a long drink of his water. “Since we’re beginning to head beyond friendship boundaries, are you ready to discuss a few things?”

Allyson swallowed. “I guess.” Her gaze went to the table.

“If you’re not ready, I can wait.”

“No.” The word burst from her. Allyson took a calming breath. “I think we need to have this talk, especially since we’re going to go beyond friendship.” She took another sip of her soda. “I should tell you that Dani and I talked Friday over lunch.”

“Oh?” His eyebrows rose.

“Nothing to worry about. I know Dani is a member of Wicked Sanctuary, but she didn’t tell me anything she shouldn’t. I needed to talk with someone after our dinner out and what you told me.”

“Did I scare you?”

“Excited me was more like it.” Communication, truthful communication, Dani told her, as did the book she read. “I’ve always felt that sex was more important than a relationship.”

Zeke opened his mouth, and she held her hand up. She needed to get this out. “Zeke, I know what you showed me. When I was growing up, all my parents seemed to care about was sex. They never really had a relationship, even though they were married. So that’s how I thought my life should be.” She wasn’t going to mention how her parents were swingers, not right now. “So, to me, sex was an itch to scratch, and after a while, I didn’t like how that felt. I stopped going to the parties in Seattle after one was raided. It didn’t feel safe anymore.” Her hand fluttered to her chest. “Dani and I talked a bit about this. She found me a few books to read to help me better understand the lifestyle you described.”

“What kind of books?” He kept his gaze on her but didn’t seem upset by what she was saying. She blew out a breath, and her muscles relaxed.

“A couple of romances, an introduction to BDSM, and another book on the Dom/sub relationship.”

“Can I ask where you got the books?”

“Kleinman’s bookstore. Dani took me there Friday, and she picked them out.” She didn’t tell him about the restraints. She was still coming to terms with owning them.

He nodded. “Good choice. Dani would know what would be the best for you and what to start with.”

“Yeah, well…” She ducked her head. Why was she embarrassed? She wasn’t a virgin by any means, but she felt a little out of her depth here. “The romance was a little different than I’ve read before.”

“How?” His voice was quiet.

“More intense, more into the lifestyle.”

“Did you like it?”

“I did. Then I started on the introduction to BDSM book.” Boy was that eye opening.

“It scared you?”

“Yes and no.” She took another sip of her soda. “This is hard for me.”

“I’m proud of you for trying. Why was it hard for you?”

“Because…” Allyson looked away. How did she explain? With honesty and open communication. “Zeke, I’m not used to talking about my emotions or about my needs.”

“You said your parents put an emphasis on sex and not a relationship.”

“Right. They weren’t faithful to each other.” Or at least that’s how she saw it. Now she understood more.

Zeke swore, and Allyson stared at him with her mouth open. “I’m sorry. No kid should know that about their parents. Did they ever divorce?”

“No. I won’t say there weren’t fights, but for some reason, they stuck together.”

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