Page 73 of Edged

“It’s more than that.” She tilted her head and their gazes met. “My father used to wave knives around and threaten us kids when he was drunk.”

Anthony didn’t know what to say. No wonder she was afraid.

“After your demo, Tessa followed me into the bathroom, and we chatted, and I also talked to Regina. I thought I was moving past it all, but what happened in the garden caused a flashback. That told me I hadn’t moved past it. Plus, that night, watching you…”

Anthony nodded. “The scene in the club.” Damn. He’d made things worse and caused her to relive some of the worst moments of her life. He felt like a world-class heel. “I’m so sorry, Kaley.”

“Please don’t be. I need to get past this, and you’ve helped kickstart that. I’m in therapy, again.”

“You don’t sound happy about it.” Therapy was probably the best thing for her, and if they survived this, he’d have to discuss maybe going together. Perhaps he could use some therapy himself. Guilt was currently eating a hole in his stomach.

“I thought I’d dealt with it, but wham, out of nowhere, the fear rolled over me, and I…” She bit her lower lip. “I don’t know if I can ever accept knife play.”

“You’re worried about that?” Astonishment hit him in the gut.

“You love knife play, and it wouldn’t be right of me to ask you to give it up. You worked hard to be good at it.”

“Kaley.” He shifted and brushed his lips over her nose. “I knew knife play was a hard limit for you, and that’s fine. Maybe at one point I thought about talking to you about trying it, but I can live without us doing knife play.”

Her eyes widened. “But I can’t even watch you do it.”

“That doesn’t matter either.” All this time, she was worried about him. “Yes, I enjoy knife play, but it isn’t all about the knives. I don’t know how much you’ve seen me do.”

“Very little.” She shivered.

“It’s more about getting inside someone’s head. I don’t use knives to cut people or make them bleed. It’s all about making them think I’m going to cut them, but it’s all in their mind. I do that by using words and sensations.”

“I think I understand.” She yawned.

“We’ve talked enough for tonight. Close your eyes and rest.”

“You’re not mad?” Her voice had a tinge of fear to it.

“Of course not.” He shifted until he could get his free arm around her. “You’re afraid; that’s understandable. We can get through it together. I’d like to help us both get through this.”

She started to speak, but he put his hand over her mouth. She’d stopped shivering, but the tension in her body was easy to feel.

“No more tonight. Relax. Close your eyes. I’ll be right here.”

“Yes, Sir,” she mumbled against his hand and closed her eyes.

Anthony laid awake a long time after Kaley relaxed in his embrace and slept. Knives were the issue, not him. Well, maybe there was a little bit of him wound up in it. Tomorrow, they’d discuss how they were going to proceed.

Chapter Twenty-Four

Kaley woke to the smell of coffee. She opened her eyes to see Anthony sitting next to her holding out a mug. “Coffee?” she muttered.

“Just for you.”

She sat up and took the mug from him. “What time is it?”

“Almost nine.” He sipped from his own mug.

Nodding, then taking a sip of her coffee, she moaned. “This is so good.”

“Lara brought it to us. She said breakfast is at nine-thirty.”

The night before came flooding back: the accident that blocked the road, coming back to the club, talking to Anthony about knives. Her hand trembled.

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