Page 62 of Reluctantly Rogue

Not to mention that Jonah will literally need to be by Torin’s side.

If Jonah has to choose between me and Torin, he’ll have to choose Torin.

That would kill Jonah. That would cause tension between him and Torin. It might affect how he does his job.

And then there’s the current king.

Diarmuid is old-fashioned, for sure. But some of it would be misplaced affection and protection on his end as well. He would want me to be with someone who had the means to support me and give me everything in the world. And yes, he would like my partner to be a good partner for Cara.

Jonah is a bodyguard. As much as Diarmuid loves me, I know that he would not think a bodyguard was good enough for me. Not as a romantic partner, anyway.

Still, I know Diarmuid likes Jonah. Trusts him. In fact, I believe that he would trust Jonah’s opinion over Torin’s in some cases.

Fuck.

I press my hand to my chest. Of course, I would have to start having feelings—romantic and sexual—for someone and it would have to be someone it could never work with.

It really would’ve been better if the feelings were unrequited. If I had made a fool of myself in the kitchen. Or if Jonah had never told me otherwise anyway.

Knowing that he wants me is even more of a turn-on. The desire I feel for him right now is nearly overwhelming. I want to go back into that living room and beg him to kiss me again.

My whole body is humming with it.

I take a deep breath. Then another. Then I make myself stand up.

Jonah is my friend. He cares about me. He wants me, but he realizes that we can’t be together.

But he has taken my feelings about Torin, and how I feel about Cara, seriously.

So I have to trust him.

If he thinks that something good can come out of me going on these dates with James and Christian, then I’ll believe him. I will at least give it a try.

That means I need to take a shower and get ready for tonight.

And maybe, since I developed feelings easily for Jonah, maybe I can develop feelings easily for one of these other men. Maybe I’ve just been too stubborn, too wrapped up in the things I thought I should do or shouldn’t do. Maybe once I let these walls down, I’ll find that romance and desire are all around me.

There’s a soft knock at my door.

I suck a breath. If Jonah comes in here right now and wants to kiss me, I am absolutely letting him.

“Yes?”

“Are you decent?”

Does he want me to be decent? “Yes.”

The door opens and Jonah leans in. “I’m going to head down to the gym for a workout. Would you like me to shower down there or?—”

“No, I’ll use the shower and everything now and then you can have it when you get back.”

He clenches his jaw, then nods. “Okay. Sounds good. Do you need anything before I leave?”

I’m shocked at the inappropriate thoughts that go through my mind. Things I could ask him for. Things I could say I need. I shake my head. “No. I’m fine.”

“Call me if that changes.”

A little part of me, a part that is very unfamiliar to me, thinks that it would be fun to call or text him with a flirtatious offer. Just to see if he would come up in the middle of a workout and give me something Ineed.

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