Page 57 of Hooked

“You really hurt me,” I say.

“I know.” His voice is rough with shame. “And I’ll regret that for the rest of my life. I want nothing more than to promise you that if you take a chance with me, that I’ll never hurt you again.”

That’s not a promise he can make. We both know it.

“But I’ll make mistakes, Sia. I can promise that I’ll never be the monster I was yesterday, but I’ll stumble as I learn how to be a good partner.”

“I’ve never expected perfection, Vinny.”

Okay, strictly speaking, that’s not true, and he gives me a look that tells me he’s onto me.

“You do, Sia. From yourself and for the things you create. And those expectations can be really harmful.”

The fearful part of my brain flares up, warning me that anything less than perfection will leave me shut out again.

“You need to let go of thinking you can control the world around you. I flipped out because I didn’t know how to handle my strong feelings for you, not because of some intrinsic flaw in you. The flaw was mine.”

I’m crying again. I’ve done nothing but cry these past two days and I hate it.

Vinny strokes a thumb across my damp cheek. “You can use my sweater as a tissue. I know how much you love it.”

I lean against his chest, and he curls his arm around me.

“I want to give you some time to think about what I’ve said,” he murmurs, kissing the top of my head. “I also want to make you a nice cioppino because it turns out that some generous, sexy as hell woman left all the ingredients in my fridge.”

“Kristi says you only make two things.” My tears soak into his sweater, turning the green a shade darker.

“No, I onlyselltwo things.” He squeezes my shoulder. “Will you come by sometime, before you go?”

“I need to get my bags anyway,” I reply.

He laughs, holding me more tightly.

I wiggle around to face him and trace my fingers over the welts on his face.

“It’s better than I deserved,” he says. “I’m just lucky Kieran thought killing me might upset you.”

There’s a hopeful note to his voice.

“I don’t want Kieran going to jail for murder,” I say, brushing my fingertips across his beard.

“His brother’s a big shot lawyer I hear. Could probably get him a reduced sentence at the very least.” Vinny’s eyes close as I continue the exploration of his face.

“I suppose you’re right,” I whisper. I straighten up and gently press my lips to the corner of his mouth.

“I love you,” he whispers, the sound raw.

I wonder how long it’s been since he told someone he loved them. Has he ever? Has anyone ever said the same to him?

He’s been through hell. I’ve faced some difficult challenges, but I knew the Doyles would’ve had my back if I’d just been brave enough to ask. That was a safety net Vinny couldn’t have dreamt of.

I need to be better about asking for what I want. And I want him.

It’s as simple, and as complicated, as that.

“I love you too,” I say, running my hands through his thick hair.

His eyes flash open, like he can’t believe what he’s heard.

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