Page 70 of Duskbound

I could feel her gaze on me, heavy with the weight of last night's conversation, but I kept my eyes fixed on the far wall. The awkwardness still hung between us, made worse by the formality of the moment.

"Fia," she said finally, gesturing to a quiet corner. "A word?"

I hesitated, remembering her sharp comments about Laryk, how I'd nearly cried my eyes out in front of them. The others pretended not to watch as I stayed rooted in place.

"I'll be quick," she added lightly. Something in her voice made me follow.

She led me to an alcove, away from curious ears. For a moment she just stood there, absently tracing the designs on her leathers.

"I was harsh last night," she said finally, meeting my eyes. "And that's the last thing I wanted to be. It's just... you've always seemed so sure of yourself. So strong. Like nothing could touch you."

I almost laughed at that. I had been their prisoner for a majority of my time here, and that didn't necessarily scream strength.

"Hearing about what happened in Sídhe," she continued, "how they treated you, how they..." She shook her head. "It caught me off guard. Made me angry. Not at you," she added quickly. "At them. At how they took someone with your power and tried to..." She gestured vaguely.

"Turn me into a weapon?" I supplied, unable to keep the edge from my voice.

"Into whatever they needed," she corrected softly. "With no regard to what they had taken from you. All while concealing the truth."

The words hit something deep inside me. I thought about that scared girl in Sídhe, the one who'd been so afraid of her ownpower. The one who'd hidden from everything until she had no choice but to fight. When had that changed? When had I become someone others saw as strong?

"I'm not—" I started, then stopped, unsure how to explain. "I wasn't always like this. Before everything, I literally just kept my head down—stuck to the shadows." A bitter laugh escaped me. "Ironic, considering."

"And now you command six Sentinels at once and make Urkin squirm in his chair." A hint of that smirk returned. "People change. Sometimes for the better, sometimes not. It sounds like your experience helped you grow. And that's never a bad thing."

I thought about that—about all the ways I'd changed since joining the Guard. Some changes had been forced upon me, others I'd chosen. But which was which? The line between them felt blurrier every day.

"I am sorry though," she added quietly. "About what I said. You didn't deserve that."

"Why does it matter to you?" I asked, the question slipping out before I could stop it. "A few weeks ago I was just your prisoner."

Something flashed across her face—pain, maybe, or recognition. "Because we're not so different." She shrugged.

Before I could respond, movement near the arena entrance caught my attention. Valkan stood with his personal guards, his milky eyes fixed on our conversation.

"He did well in the trials," I said, trying to redirect.

Vexa's mouth hardened into a line. "Too well. The drought doesn't seem to affect him at all. His abilities, his strength—none of it has diminished like the rest of us. I understand the Council's desperation, but I'd rather die than serve alongside that."

A horn sounded from above, cutting through our conversation. The sound reverberated through the stone, making several candidates jump. Through the archway, I could see nobles filing into their seats.

"Candidates," Urkin's voice boomed through the chamber. "Take your positions."

Vexa squeezed my arm once before moving away. "Whatever happens next," she whispered, "You've proved yourself already."

We filed into the arena proper, where the Generals sat in their elevated seats. The crowd seemed larger than before, the noble boxes packed with anxious faces. I couldn't help the pang in my gut at remembering that they chose Valkan. They allowed such a monster into this competition. Gave him even more power—more influence.

"Candidate Theron," Urkin's voice filled the chamber. "Step forward."

Theron moved with the same confident stride he'd shown in his trials, but I noticed a slight tremor in his hands. He stood before the Generals' platform, the torchlight reflecting off his dark hair.

"You have proven yourself worthy of the choice," Urkin stated, his voice carrying to every corner of the arena. "Your abilities show not just power, but control. Discipline." He paused, letting the words settle. "Do you choose to give yourself fully to Umbrathia? Do you choose to embrace the shadows? Will you meet the Void?"

"I will." Theron's voice carried clearly through the chamber, unwavering despite the weight of hundreds of eyes upon him. Applause erupted from the crowd as he was led away by two Spectres.

This was really happening. I swallowed the lump forming in my throat.

Kenna was next, appearing solemn as she accepted. When Cassia declined, whispers rippled through the crowd, but the Generals merely conferred briefly before offering her a position with the scouts. Her relief was palpable as she was escorted from the arena.