Page 78 of Blood Beneath the Snow

He didn’t seem fazed; he only chuckled, the sound cold as darkness. “Trying to find my humanity?”

I didn’t answer. Iwastrying to find his humanity. Truthfully, I enjoyed being with the Hellbringer more than my own family. He made me feel like myself—here I was Revna, not the godforsaken princess.

And didn’t it make me as much of a monster, to care for the man who murdered my people for sport?

“I hate to disappoint you, Princess, but it doesn’t matter. I’m the one behind the blade—metaphorically speaking, of course. I am a monster either way.”

I bit back the disappointment slicing through me, and we walked in silence the rest of the way. But it didn’t keep my thoughts from spinning. There was something beneath the mask I wanted to discover. What was it?

A memory came unbidden. The summer I was twelve, a delegate from Faste had come to the castle. She had dark hair that fell in dreadlocks and gold piercings peppering her brown skin. There was a tattoo on her forehead she’d explained to me, though that part of the memory was fuzzy. But I did remember her peculiar Lurae—she could taste the emotions of the people around her.

“Imagine the bittersweet taste of a lemon,” she’d whispered to me at dinner. “That is what it tastes like to dream of what you can never have.”

I held back a sigh. The memory of lemons lingered in my mouth. I couldn’t deny it—I wished the Hellbringer might feel I was worth something. That I was important enough to make a difference. That he wouldn’t be disappointed or disgusted with the lack of potential in me, not the way others were.

And I supposed, deep down, I wished he would take me away from it all.

“What is the queen ofKryllian like?”

The sound of a knife scraping shreds off a block of wood stopped instantly, and I looked up from where I sat at the table, pretending to read the book on war strategy. I rubbed the thin pages between my fingers, anxiously awaiting his reply.

He was in the middle of carving something, though I wasn’t sure what. I’d tried several times to steal glances, but it was too early totell what the finished product would be. Perhaps another hilt for a weapon. The other day, he’d presented me with two of the daggers he forged while I was busy shaping Aloisa.

I’d accepted the gifts reverently, uncertain how to feel about the gesture. But considering I was training for battle, I wasn’t about to turn down a weapon.

“I only ask because surely she and I will be working closely after the war is over,” I hurriedly explained, not entirely certain why I was so nervous about having this conversation with him. “I want to make sure allying with her is the best choice—the right choice.”

“Of course it’s the right choice,” he scoffed. “You don’t have another one. The only reason this war isn’t already over is because the queen doesn’t want it to be. If she did, your family would be dead at my hand long ago.”

“And that’s what I don’t understand. Why are we still fighting? If she could easily destroy us and take Bhorglid in a few days, then why hasn’t she?”

The Hellbringer sighed and set down his project. “I wish I knew. The citizens are becoming tired of the war, from what I can tell. There is no public interest in taking over Bhorglid, only in stopping the violence. Many people are frustrated with the queen for not ending things when she easily has the power to.”

“Through you,” I pointed out. “Does she really have any power other than what you offer her?”

“Yes.” His response was instant and gravely serious. “I’m nothing more than a weapon to her. A powerful one, to be sure, but if I weren’t here, she still could have conquered your country in just a few weeks.”

“A few weeks?” I gaped. “This war has been constant for the past sevenyears.”

“I know.” He moved a hand toward his mask, then seemed to catch himself, closing his fingers into a fist before bringing it backdown. I wondered if he had wanted to run his hand through his hair or rub it along his jawline. “This is bigger to her, for some reason. I have the same question you do: Why does she want to end the war now, when you have the potential to sit on the throne? It’s not out of any desire to spare your people, I can assure you.”

“What is her Lurae?”

“No one knows. She’s never used it in any recognizable way.”

I stared, uncertain what to say. “She sounds…as bad as my father.”

He shrugged. “Maybe. I don’t know your father well enough to say.”

I swallowed. If I won the Trials and became queen, would it only be possible to end the war by becoming a pawn again?

“Hellbringer?” He looked up. “Why do you stay? Why do you kill for her?”

His gloved fingers began to drum against the table. The quiet, bated breaths escaping me while I waited to see if he would answer felt like anvils against my chest. This woman, this queen I would have to bargain with for the safety of my people…was she hurting him? What did she hold against him to make him do these things?

The Hellbringer cleared his throat and stared into the fire. “I have a sister.”

I was afraid to ask, but I had to. “Is the queen…”

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