Page 83 of Blood Beneath the Snow

I moved the tunic to the side, and he ran gentle fingers over where the slice had been. There was nothing—no shadow of pain or injury. “I must say, that’s some of my best work,” he murmured. “You’ll be good as new in the morning. Get a good night’s sleep and it shouldn’t bother you at all. Next time you’re training, be more careful.”

Volkan moved toward the entrance of the tent, ducking out and leaving me alone in the dim light.

I sat up, wrapping my arms around myself. Perhaps I was reading into things, but it seemed like a rash move to send Mira into foreign territory simply to bring Volkan here. But my thoughts didn’t dwell on the matter for long before they drifted to the Hellbringer.

Volkan had said the Hellbringer had feelings for me.

And he hadn’t denied it.

I lay back on the bed, one pillow behind my head and another in my arms. Behind my closed eyelids, I saw a faint memory—my head nestled against the Hellbringer’s chest, my arm draped over him.

My eyes flew open again. Shit. Had I honestly been so delirious I’d asked him to stay with me while I slept?

The tent flap opened to reveal the Hellbringer and I sat up again,my heart beating too fast. For a moment he just stood there, the two of us staring at each other.

“I want to apologize,” he said finally, stepping to the side of the bed and sitting in the chair next to it. I wondered how long I’d been unconscious—whether the chair had been occupied for most of that time. Something within me already knew the answer. “For injuring you. I was careless and angry, and you suffered for it.”

My cheeks flushed. I pushed myself up to a sitting position, leaning against the makeshift headboard. For a war front tent, these were nice accommodations. “It’s fine.”

“No, it isn’t.” He shook his head. “I’ve spent days stewing over everything. You asked me for something I wanted to give you and, not being able to acquiesce…” I watched his throat bob. “It’s been eating away at me. It was easier to blame you, to be angry, to convince myself you were asking too much. And then we were sparring and you were…” The Hellbringer huffed a laugh. “Everything. You asked what the fuck my problem was and I wanted to toss my weapon down and pin you against the wall and just…”

A loaded silence fell over the tent. Before I had any inkling of how to respond, how to feel in the wake of his confession—Pin me against the wall andwhat?my thoughts demanded—he continued. “Even when I’m not using my Lurae, people are in danger from me. It’s no wonder they’re all afraid.”

I didn’t know what possessed me, but something in his voice sounded like longing, despite the distortion. I reached out and laid my hand on top of his. He lifted his head.

“I am not afraid of you,” I whispered.

“Don’t lie,” he said bitterly. “I could have killed you at any point. I saw the fear in your eyes from the moment I arrived on the battlefield. You’ve heard the stories.”

“I didn’t say I’veneverbeen afraid of you,” I chuckled. “Only that I’m not anymore. And besides, everyone has heard the stories.”

He tilted his head and shrugged. “I suppose some of them are true.”

Honesty burst from me despite my instincts. “I don’t want you to take me back when you’re done training me.”

“What? Why not?”

“Because I’m enjoying my time with you,” I said hurriedly. Meeting the eyes of the mask was an impossible task, so I continued staring at my hands. “Here I’m your equal. Not your pawn, the way I am my father’s. And if I do win, the corruption in Bhorglid runs deep. Becoming queen is the beginning. We would have a long road ahead of us.”

There was a pause. “ ‘Us’?”

I felt my face turn red. “No, I didn’t mean—not like that. I’m sorry.”

“There is nothing to be sorry for.”

I glanced at him. There were things I missed about seeing the sun every day, but I had meant what I said. If the choice were up to me, I would stay with the Hellbringer. I wondered if he would want to stay with me.

If I were to become queen, could we be together?

“Tell me something true?” I asked tentatively. He nodded, and I continued: “What will your life look like? When the war is over. When you don’t have to be the Hellbringer anymore.”

He tilted his head. “Will that time ever come?” he asked. “If I am not a war machine, then I am an assassin. Another tool in the queen’s pocket. I will remain in Kryllian as her weapon until she sees fit to let me go. If that ever occurs.”

I swallowed a lump in my throat. When this ended, he would remain under the control of another. Still the most powerful man in the Fjordlands. Still a weapon to be wielded.

“I don’t envy you,” I said.

“Well, I don’t envyyou,” he replied. “Trying to kill your mostpowerful brothers with only a month of training under your belt. The odds aren’t good.”

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