Page 16 of Love and Other Paradoxes

She bit her lip. “You must’ve done. That’s how all the fancy people end up knowing each other, right?”

“Right,” he agreed. “Where else would I have met someone like her?”

“Okay. So you met here. But there’s no way you were supposed to just walk up to her in the street and tell her you’re meant to be.”

“How do you know?”

She spluttered. “Because I know! No romance in history has ever started like that.”

“And you’re an expert?”

“Actually, yeah. I read a lot of romance.” She sat back, looking embarrassed. “And no, I’m not accepting any comments on that.”

Something clicked in his mind. He started laughing. “It all makes sense. Don’t you see?” He leaned across the table, beaming. “You’re going to help me and Diana get together.”

Her face was a picture of confusion. “I don’t get it. Why do you think you need help, if you believe it’s meant to be?”

“Because it’s all meant to be. All of it. You were meant to come back in time. You and your—romance expertise, and your knowledge of the future, and...” He shook his head, delighted. “Now I see it, it’s obvious that’s the only way it could happen. Diana’s way out of my league. Or that’s what I’d think, if I didn’t know I was going to be with her.”

Esi’s smile started small and grew until it was wide and dazzling. “You,” she said, shaking her head, “are crazy.”

“They didn’t teach you that in school?”

“Maybe. Told you, I wasn’t listening.” Her smile faded. “But—I can’t think like that. Like everything’s going to turn out the same no matter what.”

“That’s fine,” he insisted. “We don’t have to agree on how this all works. What matters is, we both want me and Diana to get together. Right?”

She nodded slowly. “Right.”

He tapped the photograph. “And while you’re helping me with that, I can help you find your mum.”

She looked suspicious. “Why would you help me find her if you don’t think I can save her?”

He shrugged. “You might as well try. Worst case, you get to see her one last time.”

Her eyes flicked up to the ceiling. “Okay,” she said. “Deal.”

She slid her hand into his. She had already affected his life so profoundly that it was strange they hadn’t touched until now. Her palm was cool and soft, as lightly anchored to this moment as the rest of her. He could almost feel the gulf of time stretching between them. It made him a little dizzy.

She coughed, drawing back her hand. In search of somewhere to look, he focused on the photograph. He felt ashamed of how quickly he had turned the page, more interested in his own story. Now, knowing how this girl’s story ended, there was a haunting quality to the picture: her lifted chin, her tense, bare shoulders, the sea of white faces behind her. “Do you know what college she’s at? Or what she’s studying?”

Esi shook her head. “She never really talked about her time here. It wasn’t easy for her. She never felt like she belonged, and she had to work twice as hard as the white students to get half as far. I guess she didn’t want to relive that.” She shrugged. “I went through the stuff she left behind, but either she got rid of anything from here or she never kept it in the first place.”

“But she still came back twenty-five years later. So whatever she got the award for must have been important to her.” He tapped the table, thinking. “You could try asking at student registry. They should have a record of everyone who’s studying here.”

“Already tried. They wouldn’t tell me anything. Data protection, apparently.” She folded her arms grumpily. “Didn’t know you had that back here in medieval times.”

“Okay, so we bypass the official channels. We’ve got her picture. We can make photocopies.”

“Photo—copies?”

“Come on, the clue is in the word.”

“Oh. Right.” She frowned. “You mean, like, put posters up?”

“Aye. And we can ask around. Someone’s bound to know someone who knows someone who—”

“No,” she interrupted. “No asking around, no posters. I told you, I don’t want to affect anything else in her life. Getting everyone talking about her, sticking her face up all over town? Can you imagine the changes that might set off?” She shook her head tightly. “I want to find her quietly. If I do it right, she’ll never even know I was here.” In her guarded posture, he sensed something she wasn’t saying. But the same intuition told him not to push it. “I need to focus on the award. If I can find out what it is, I can try and change who wins it.” Catching his look, she added, “I know you think that’s impossible. Just humour me.”

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