Page 27 of Absolute Valor

Being happy doesn’t mean that everything is perfect. It means you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections.

—Anonymous

Dark wood furniture with white linen sheets and aqua blue pillows bring the blue of the ocean into the room. Granite tabletops sat beside the bed on each side, holding globe lamps in colors, which complimented the pillows. I’ve seen plenty of rooms like this in pictures on magazine covers, but I never thought I’d ever get to sleep in one. The large window, which takes up three quarters of the far wall, gives me a clear view of the waves, which roll softly to the shore. Children run in and out of the surf, their parents chasing them or helping to build sand castles, only to watch them fall with the power of the surf.

Setting my backpack on the end of the bed, I know I have a small amount of time to get the sweat of the day off me, and get down to the pool. Unzipping the top, I pull out the only cute sundress I own, and rush into the bathroom to jump into the shower. I know it’s silly, I’m going to be out in the heat and in the chlorine of the pool, but I’m covered in sweat and smell like a Yeti.

I know I need to hurry so as not to make anyone wait for me, but as much as I loved Priscilla’s shower, I’m in a whole lot of like with this one, too. As I’m brushing my hair into a ponytail, the sound of laughter and pounding on my door lets me know the girls have arrived. Shoving my dirty clothes in an extra trash bag, I open the door to three giggling women, each with a glass of something in their hands.

“Hello, Darlin’. You look pretty.” Priscilla kisses my cheek, the smell of wine on her breath.

“Here, we brought you a glass.” Lainie says as she pushes past me and presses a glass into my hand.

I’m stunned they are coming in; the men are expecting us in about five minutes. “Um…don’t we have to meet the guys?” I questioned, pointing behind me and meaning much further than the door.

Claire is seated on the edge of my bed, her legs crossed, leaning back on her left hand. “Audrey, one thing we will show you is how to make a gentleman anxious to see you.” She took a drink as the other ladies nodded in agreement.

“Those men are sitting around the bar, ordering a beer and talking about three things.” Lainie added, pointing her glass in my direction. “First, they are talking about how their bikes handled the trip,” Claire spoke. “Then, about how Austin is acting like a long tailed cat in a rocking chair factory.” I had noticed his nervousness when we pulled u, but ignored it. “And third, they’re discussing what happens if Chase makes you cry again…they’ll break both his legs.”

“And for that reason, we are going to relax up here for a few minutes, giving them all the time in the world they need to talk about us while we talk about…you.” Priscilla has such an eloquent way of arranging her words to not only convey what she needed to say, but also to hide her intentions until it was too late.

“The boys have shared the basics with us, how you came to work for them and such. That dreadful woman from the shop dropped a few more facts about you, but we have questions of our own.” Clarity is a monstrous thing, bringing with it not only the understanding of something you’re seeking, but also others true meanings. These ladies possessed class—a fact which doesn’t exclude them from being busy bodies. Each was gifted with a fierce love and devotion for their family, and were willing to do anything, and everything, they could to protect it. I was a literal stranger in their eyes and they would not stop until they dragged the information from me.

“Such as?” I remained respectful, yet sent a message of my own; I was not going to cower at their feet and cry.

“Relax, we have good intentions.” Claire tried to soothe. I knew all too well the kind of goodness this family represented. With loyalty comes passion and protection, all swirled together to create a force so mighty, it’s tough to beat, and even less forgiving when wronged.

Giving nothing away, I fixed my focus on the leader of the pack. “Audrey we all know you had a difficult upbringing, it’s written in the fibers of your personality. Setting the hardness aside, what did you want to be when you grew up?” I had expected the time-honored speech about avoiding anything to hurt or shame Chase and the family. Asking something so personal never hit my radar. “What did you dream of doing when you were a little girl?”

My first grade teacher, Mrs. Goodson, was an elderly lady who commanded a room like an Army General. She had such a passion for reading, which she shared with all of her students. Every day she would pull us into a circle and read to us. Not just reciting the words from the page, but making the characters come to life, changing her voice and, on occasion, wearing different hats or glasses. I would go home and tuck away in a corner, trying to imitate her and the way she spoke. Toward the end of the school year, she had us make up a story of our own. We went around the circle, each adding to the words of the one before us. It was that summer I created my first children’s book. As I grew older, my tastes changed with my age, but the love of a good book has never left me.

“I’ve always been a storyteller, creating pictures in my mind, and then putting them to paper or sharing with the four walls around me.” When I started seeing Lucas, he made fun of my reading, said any decent book is made into a movie so you might as well just watch television. I didn’t argue with him, even though a multitude of incredible books wait on the shelf and have never, or will never, entertain us on the big screen.

“I’ve always wanted to write children’s books.” Memories flood my mind as I say the words; puppies and kittens playing with children as they tumbled and tried to solve the mysteries I created for them. “But I didn’t know how to get started. Instead, I began thinking I could go to school to be a chef, working in resorts like this one, and create art using food for people to enjoy.” I’d started culinary school here in Charleston when Granny got sick and I had to take care of her. Family, who had once surrounded her at supper and dinnertime, couldn’t be found when she was sick in bed and dying. Years of hateful words and being cussed at, and I was the one who held her hand as she took her last breath. “But the culinary world is dominated by males, which is kind of ironic if you think about it. History has shown us women spend their days in the kitchen, preparing meals for their family. Yet, to be famous and considered a chef, you stand a better chance if you’re male.”

Priscilla wrinkled her brow, jerking her head several times, “You know, I’ve never really thought about it, but you’re right.” Taking the last of her drink, she set the glass on the granite table top, her mind still pondering my theory.

“You know if you wanted to get into writing, I could build a webpage for you. I’m sure my boss will cut you a good deal, since he knows you.” Having a pretty webpage is nice, but when you have no product, that’s all it is, something nice to look at. “And Heidi has a few friends who are trying to build their portfolios. I bet if you give them credit, they would draw any picture you wanted.” They made it sound so simple, but if living as I have for the past few years has taught me anything, its favors come with a price.

“Okay, we’ve overwhelmed her enough. Audrey you have an entire team ready to help, just say the word. For now, let’s go soak up some vitamin D and have a cold drink with some hot men.” You never know what to expect out of Priscilla, never a curse word and most definitely not the phrase, “hot men.”

Leaving the comfort of the air-conditioned hotel, the glass doors slide apart, letting in the heat and humidity of the Florida beach. The roar of the ocean waves drowns out the music coming from one of the bars around the massive pool. Waitresses in the same blue from the pillows scamper around the pool deck, delivering ice cold beverages to sun worshipers. The unmistakable fragrance of sunscreen, coconut, and other tropical mixes, fills my senses with memories of summers spent in Savannah. Our neighbor spent most of her day in the back yard covered in oil. I’ve avoided the sun as much as possible, fearing the pain of sunburn, which always comes when the sun sinks below the horizon.

Wet bodies glisten in the bright sunlight, but four particularly handsome backs stand out in the sea of tanning skin. Chase and his brother’s lean against the far edge of the pool, beers in their hands, and sunglasses covering sensitive eyes. I now have a unobstructed view of the ink that had peaked out of the top of his collar. In an old English script are the letters, USMC. The top edge of the filigree M is what teased me for the past five hours. His right arm is filled with various designs and symbols, including a rosary intertwined with a slideshow of his past.

“Audrey?” Claire calls my name, grabbing my attention away from the man who has so much to offer, and even more to lose being with me. Lucas is a bottom dweller, he steals, lies, and cheats, but when he thinks he’s been wronged, he’s like a pit bull, sinking his teeth into something and not letting go.

Patting a chair beside her, as the men wading through the water joining their girls along the side. “Where’s your suit?” Priscilla questioned as I sat on the edge of the lounger, tucking my dress under my legs.

“I don’t own one.” I respond honestly. Being poor isn’t a sin, but lying about it will send you straight to hell. I’ve spent enough time there.

“Well, come with me and let’s rectify this.” Priscilla swings her bare legs to the side, but I’m quick to stop her.

“No, thank you, Miss Priscilla. I’m perfectly fine as I am.” She’s someone who is used to fixing her problems with a swipe of a credit card or handing over cash. I’ve found doing without never killed anyone. If I’m going to stand a chance at taking my life back, I’m starting with opening my mouth and giving honest answers. Priscilla must recognize determination when she sees it, as she resumes her position on her chair, wide brim hat now covering the delicate skin of her face.

“Lainie Faith, get over here and let me remind you how much I love you.” Austin and the guys were now less than two feet away. All four were looking like they were carved out of marble, everything chiseled perfectly. Lainie rose from her chair, bright orange bikini highlighting what god gave her. As she nears the edge, Austin holds up his arms and catches her as she jumps into the cold water, smothering her with a smoldering kiss that receives a round of applause.

“Audrey,” Claire scoots over to the chair Lainie vacated, her baby blue bikini giving her perfect skin a glow. “Something you said upstairs got me to thinking.” She glances quickly at Dylan who has taken a phone call, his back to us now. Chase is talking with Dean about something on his phone. “You wanted to be a chef, but didn’t because of the whole male thing? The same thing is true in nursing, most are women so I guess that balances it out.” She chuckles, swatting at a fly that landed on her tan leg. “How do you feel about the traditional family from years ago? You know when the mother stayed home and took care of not only the cooking, but the house and kids?”

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