Page 24 of Love and Other Chances

“Look, Teegan, I probably should have kicked off this conversation with an apology,” Bailey says, finally looking me in the eyes.

I was not prepared for that either.“Okay?” I question.

“I know that I wasn’t kind to you, Lana, and Amaya when we were students,” Bailey starts again. “I was rude and condescending, and that’s something I deeply regret.”

Ummm, where’s the guidebook for discussions like this? Because I’m lost. Shewascondescending and rude. But is it rude of me to agree with her?

Thankfully, Bailey continues talking before I need to formulate a response. “The truth is, I was really jealous of you three.”

I laugh out loud but then clap a hand to my mouth.

“Bailey, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have laughed,” I apologize. “That was so rude of me. I’m genuinely a little . . . perplexed as to how you could be jealous of us? You were the Queen Bee of TriAlpha. The Queen Bee of Townsend, really. You always oozed confidence and were surrounded by people.”

Bailey sighs. “I know I projected that image, that I came across as ‘popular.’” She accentuates the word with air quotes. “But I always wanted the closeness the three of you had. I never really found those deep relationships with anyone in TriAlpha. Everything was always surface level. And, well . . . I had a lot of insecurities coming into college.”

She’s fiddling with her napkin, and I silently give her space to continue.

“I grew up really wealthy. Ever since I was a baby, there’s been a trust fund with my name on it. And my parents just always assumed I would live off of those funds. They never expected anything of me. Never thought that I would make a career for myself.” Bailey pauses again. “I chose to come to Townsend as my petty way to get back at them for their lack of belief in me. Found a small, no-big-deal university in the middle of Kansas instead of choosing one of the posh private universities they wanted me to attend. Because, really, they only thought my degree would be a trophy, not something I’d actually use.

“When I met you three our freshman year, Amaya had all these lofty career goals and the charisma to achieve them. Lana was ridiculously driven, with her life path all mapped out and supportive parents cheering her on. And you were always the social sun that everyone revolved around in Arrow. People genuinely wanted to be around you because you made everyone feel so special. You created so much joy, like it was your sole mission to make people have fun. The three of you had these clear ambitions and people in your corners.”

Bailey’s eyes well up with tears as she continues. “And you had each other. This special connection—even your own made-up group nickname. I just wished that I could have a fraction of the friendship and vision and support that you all had. But I let that jealousy and insecurity drive me to act like I was better than you, that I had everything together. I covered it up because I didn’t want anyone knowing how lonely I was.”

There’s a lull as Bailey stops talking and wipes her eyes. I know I should respond, but I still feel too stunned to know what to say. Reaching a hand across the table, I place it lightly on Bailey’s arm to buy my brain time to formulate thoughts.

“I wish you would have said something in college, Bailey,” I finally say. “I’m sorry that you were going through that without anyone knowing. And I’m sorry that I didn’t make more of an effort to get to know you or include you in our friend group.”

Bailey waves me off. “No, it wasn’t your fault, Teegan. The way I treated you all didn’t exactly invite deeper friendship. I was completely immature and snooty. I know I was.”

“Even so—we could have done more to build a friendship with you. We were immature too, not making an effort to see beyond the surface of your actions. Will you forgive me for that, Bailey?” I ask.

“Even though I don’t think you really even owe me an apology, I absolutely forgive you,” she responds, earnestness in her eyes. “Will you forgive me as well?”

“Of course!” I assure her. “With you being back in Brooklyn now, maybe we can have a fresh start.”

“I’d like that.” Bailey smiles, but then the corners of her mouth fall again. “Do you think that Amaya and Lana would be open to hearing an apology? Or are the bridges totally burned? I wouldn’t blame them at all if they didn’t want to give me a second thought.”

I’ll make sure they give it thought.“I think you could absolutely reach out to them. Maybe let me give them a tiny heads-up first?”

Bailey nods, then picks up her taco. “Thanks for giving me another chance, Teegan.”

After leaving dinner with Bailey, I immediately send a long voice memo to the Beef group chat. We already had our weekly video call earlier this afternoon, and I know they’re both busy this evening, but I couldn’t delay filling them in on what Bailey shared.

AMAYA

Wow. I never ever would have guessed that she acted that way because she was jealous of us. I mean, it always seemed like she had a whole posse from TriAlpha following her every move

LANA

You know what—Mateo tried to tell me once that Bailey was jealous of me. Right after she confronted me at that Arrow meeting after Mateo and I had started dating.

At the time, I blew off the suggestion, but turns out my insightful man was right allalong

She’s planning to contact you both to apologize, so prepare yourselves. Please respond well to her!

LANA

I can respond well!

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