Page 40 of If You Love Me

I give her a look.

She gives me one back.

“I can get you box seats,” I tell Dad. “I’ll even book your flights. Just send me a link to your calendar.”

“I guess that can work,” he says after a moment. “Make sure it’s business class, please. I’ll send you money to cover the cost.” He’s typing again.

“Sure, Dad. The girls will be excited. They’ll come to the game, too.”

Ophelia gives me two thumbs down. A chunk of banana falls to the floor.

I hand her a damp cloth.

“It’ll be nice to see them,” he says, sounding more upbeat. “I can’t believe Ophelia is almost through high school. Time really does fly. How are you doing for Christmas gifts? Can you send me a list for the girls and yourself? I can top up your account so you can get something special.”

“You don’t need to do that. This job pays really well.”

“I know. But Toronto’s expensive, and you’re doing this on your own.”

I take a breath. I know he means well. This is mostly how he expresses emotion. “We’re fine. I promise.” I practically raised myself, so I’m used to being self-sufficient. Taking money from my dad isn’t something I enjoy.

“Okay, I’ll stop pushing. You can add the flight details to my calendar once you’ve booked it,” he says.

“Sounds good.”

“I’ll see you in a couple of days.”

“Looking forward to it. Bye, Dad.” I end the call.

Fee props her hip against the counter.

“If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all,” I warn.

“We probably shouldn’t tell Callie in advance, in case he cancels,” Fee replies.

“Agreed.” We’ve played in New York, but my dad got tied up at work. I get it, even though it’s hard to always take a back seat to his job.

Fee’s expression shifts. “It sucks that this is the first game he’s been able to make.”

I don’t defend him to Fee, because she’s right. “Yeah, it does.”

“Doesn’t it make you angry?” she asks.

I sigh. “It used to, but therapy helps. Some people just aren’t designed to be parents, and they don’t realize it until after they’ve had kids. He tries in the ways he knows how.”

Her lips pull to the side. “Mom never had anything nice to say about him.”

Phantom pain makes my heart ache. “I know. She wanted him to be someone he couldn’t be, and that was difficult for her. You have to learn how to love people the way they are, not the way you wish they were.”

“That seems hard.”

“It is, but it also saves your sanity.” I open my arms and make a bring-it-in motion.

She steps in and wraps her arms around me. “I miss them,” she whispers.

“I know. Me, too.”

“Kristoff! Yay! I’m so glad you’re here for the game!” Callie throws herself into my dad’s arms.

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