Page 99 of If You Love Me

“That’s a bonus. I just mean this.” I motion between us. “Domestic comfort, I guess. I haven’t had someone to do this with since, well…never, really.”

She empties a bag of green apples into a bowl and sets them on the counter. “Not even when you were with Peggy’s mother?”

“We were kids, and I was drafted in the middle of her pregnancy. She moved with me to Vancouver when I started playing for the farm team, but it was hard on her. She was on her own a lot, and I was on the ice all the time, so after a few months she moved back to her parents’. We tried again after Peggy was born, but we just…didn’t fit. She thought the travel would be fun, but it was a challenge with a baby, and she spent all her time in hotel rooms, trying to cope. I also don’t share well, and my brand of sex didn’t work for us. I didn’t want to feel bad about what I need, and I didn’t want her to feel bad for not liking it.”

“That must have been hard for both of you.”

“We realized early on that we would be better as friends.”

“What about since then? You must have dated.” Lexi puts the bottle of wine in the fridge to chill.

“I did for the first few years. But Peggy stayed with me in the off-season, and I wanted my focus to be on her,” I explain. “Zara moved around a lot and it was hard on Peggy. She wasn’t thriving and Zara realized she would have more stability with me. So when she was six, Peggy came to live with me full time. I didn’t have room in my life for anything but her and hockey.”

Lexi props her hip against the counter. “You didn’t have room, or you didn’t make room?”

“Hmm...” I mirror her pose and drag my finger along the edge of her jaw. “The latter more than the former. When I was home, I wanted to be with Peggy. Her first six years I missed a lot. I wanted to be present when I wasn’t traveling. I tried a relationship once, but my daughter was my priority.”

“And now?”

I smile. “She’s settled. In love. Hollis has already asked permission to marry her, so it’s only a matter of time.” I finger the end of her braid. “Peggy has been so adamant that I start dating I kept putting it off. I was so afraid I’d bring the wrong person into our lives, or that I couldn’t give enough of myself to someone else. But she doesn’t need me to take care of her the way I once did. So now I get to focus on myself and what I want for my future.”

“And what do you want?” she asks softly.

“You.”

“You have me.”

“Mmm...” I grab the hem of her shirt and pull her closer. “I want more than a stolen night with you, Lexi.”

She loops her arms around my neck. “Me, too.”

“I’m falling for you.” If I leave the game, we would have every night together.

“I’m falling for you, too.” Her voice is a barely audible whisper. “But it’s already February.” She smooths her hands over my chest. “Just a few more months. Then I’m not your coach, and you’re not my goalie, and the red tape disappears.”

“I know it won’t be easy.” I brush my lips over hers. “And that there will be challenges, but I can’t lose you again, Lexi.”

“You won’t.” She takes my face in her hands. “I promise we will find a way through this, together.”

CHAPTER 30

LEXI

“I’ll see you after the game.” I hug my sisters at the private entrance to the arena, reserved for injured players and staff.

“You ready for popcorn and snacks?” Dred links arms with Callie.

“Yes! Do you think I’ll get to say hi to Connor after the game?” Callie asks.

“Definitely. You’re his favorite,” Dred replies and winks at me.

“Try to keep her away from the caffeinated beverages,” I whisper to Fee.

“I’ll do my best.”

“Good luck tonight, Lexi.” Tally smiles and waves.

Tally’s boyfriend, who’s been hanging in the background, gives us a chin tip and follows the girls down the hall.

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