Page 73 of Game Changer

“Ok. How do you feel?” she asked, her voice filled with concern.

She doesn’t look convinced. She’s hesitant. Does she not want to upset you by being here? Does she not believe that you remember her? Why can’t you tell what she’s thinking? Why is everything so hazy? Have I ever been able to tell what you’re thinking?

“I feel like I’ve slept for a week,” he told her, truthfully.

“Close enough,” she replied. “We’re just hitting day six, seven maybe? I dunno what time it is.”

“Really? It’s been that long?” he asked, surprised.

“Yeah.”

“Why were you connected to an IV earlier?” he asked.

“Shit,” she groaned. “I forgot about the stupid IV. I fainted this morning. You had what looked like a seizure, but I have no idea if that’s actually what it was because I freaked out. Then fainted. But I’m ok.”

“Ok people don’t faint,” he answered matter-of-factly.

Don’t feed me that bullshit, Lisa. I may not remember, but I feel like I definitely know you better than that.

She smiled at him. “Touché. I guess I’ve been running a little on empty,” she confessed. “Are you really ok? I’ve been so scared that you wouldn’t wake up.”

“I’m feeling a little better now that I’ve calmed down a bit and am more aware of being conscious. For the last while, I’ve been able to feel people holding my hand and the nurse washing me, but I haven’t been able to do anything about it. I’ve heard voices, non-descript, kind of like I was underwater, but I couldn’t open my eyes. Having no control of my body, people doing whatever they wanted, whenever they wanted – even if it was medical staff. I didn’t know that at first. I could hear everything, but I couldn’t move, speak or stop them. I was helpless.”

“It sounds so scary, AJ,” her voice was almost a whisper.

“Terrifying,” he replied as a tear slid down his cheek.

Please don’t freak out and leave me. I’m not ready to be alone right now. What if I go back to sleep and don’t wake up? What if I can’t move again?

Crap. Don’t panic. Breathe.

She wiped away his tear, stroked his cheek and kissed his forehead before panic crossed her face.

“I’m sorry,” she began. “You’ve just gotten done telling me that you basically felt violated by everyone these last few days and –”

“Shhhhhhhh….” he soothed and held his arm out to give her an awkward hug. “I need you to help me remember,” he told her quietly as he held her. “I’ve felt like I was sitting in a white room, waiting. There was no light at the end of the tunnel type-deal for me. Waiting for what? I have no idea, but I’ve been scared too, terrified. And I have a feeling that this isn’t over, please don’t give up on me, Lis.”

They were both crying. The exchange had clearly taken it out of him so she stroked his cheek and tried to shush him to sleep. As he dozed off, he silently pleaded with her not to leave, enjoying the comfort her warm hand provided against his cheek.

***

The door opened, and Cindy walked in with two steaming cups and offered one to Lisa. “Here you go,” she said quietly.

“Thanks. He woke up for a few minutes. I think he’s starting to remember more.”

“I’ve spoken to the doctors and they say his scans are promising. We just have to keep prodding his memory and try not to overwhelm him. You know how frustrated he can get at himself.”

They sat talking quietly for about an hour and AJ dozed in and out of sleep. A nurse came to take his blood pressure, and the cuff woke him up again.

“Mom?” he mumbled.

“I’m here, son.” She brought his hand to her mouth and kissed his knuckles.

“Everything is so fuzzy,” he told her.

“I know, darling, I know. Just be patient with yourself,” she advised.

“Where’s Dad?” he asked.

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