Page 76 of Four Letter Feelings

Chapter 30

Jeremy felt an odd mixture of sadness and pride as he watched the finals of the Frozen Four, playoff tournament. He was sad that the Chargers’ winning streak and their playoff run had come to an end, but he was also proud at how far he, and the entire team, had come. It was the second weekend of April and the Chargers’ quest for victory had fallen short of making it to the top four teams, but they’d gelled together as such a cohesive unit that for a moment he had thought they’d do it. He and AJ hosted the team to watch the final game of the hockey season and he was sure that underneath all of the empty pizza boxes and beer bottles, their house still remained.

Most of the players had left as soon as the game had finished, but Blake, Chris and Mike had stayed behind to shoot the shit and hang out. As Jeremy stepped over some discarded pizza boxes with trash bags in hand, he shook his head.

“I mean, I always knew we ate a lot, but shit, y’all. That’s a lot of freakin’ pizza!”

Blake laughed. “Dude, you ate like thirty-five percent of the total pizza that arrived at this house tonight. You know that, right? I dunno where the hell you put it, but I know you consumed it!”

Jeremy shrugged as he tossed a bag at Blake, and started to collect all of the beer bottles in the other. “What can I say? I gotta good appetite.”

“Oh, I know you do, big boy,” Blake answered with a wink. “And I also know you ain’t been getting any lately, and I didn’t see you drink a single beer all night. What gives? You been abducted by aliens or something?”

“Nah, man. I’m just having a bit of an alcohol detox,” he answered truthfully. He knew his friends had witnessed his crash and burn so there was no point in lying to them.

“Good for you,” Mike encouraged. “Not to sound like a patronizing prick or anything, but you’ve definitely done a complete one-eighty, man. We’re all proud of you.”

Jeremy smiled, and blushed at the recognition. He hated the fact he had crashed out so hard, but at the same time he was proud of himself for finding the strength to turn it around and make things better for himself.

“Now if he could just find a woman to put up with him for more than one night, our lil Jer Jer would be a happy man,” Chris joked.

“I’ll drink to that,” Jeremy muttered, feeling his phone vibrate in his pocket. In a moment of weakness, he’d turned on notifications on Facebook, so every time Chelsea posted on her Facebook page, he got an alert. He opened the app and clicked on the notification and saw a picture of her, looking gorgeous and out with her friends at the local bar.

Well, well, Ms. Davis, look who’s in town.

“All this talk of women… anyone fancy a beer at the bar?”

Chris and Mike declined, AJ said he’d finish cleaning up the mess before heading to his parents’ house for the weekend so before long, Blake and Jeremy were ordering a beer at the bar.

“Is he here?” Jer asked Blake with a suggestive wiggle of his eyebrows.

“I dunno.” He looked eagerly around the bar, causing Jer to smile. Blake and Ben hadn’t officially labelled their relationship as a relationship, but they’d certainly progressed into something. Jeremy wasn’t quite sure where they were at, but Blake didn’t turn to a puddle of goo on the floor when he bumped into Ben and he knew that they’d gone out on a few dates. Blake said they were taking it slowly, Ben had been burned by his ex and he’d been bullied in high school for being gay so wasn’t as out out as Blake was. For that reason, Blake didn’t want to put a label on it, or rush it and he was convinced he was going to mess everything up somehow. Jeremy wasn’t sure where Blake got his balls of steel from but he knew that life as a black gay athlete in the south couldn’t have been easy, so if anyone would be sensitive to what Ben was going through, it would be Blake.

“I see him.” Jeremy spotted Ben standing with friends behind Blake.

“Don’t mess with me, man.” He shoved Jeremy playfully. “I ain’t your performing monkey, yo.”

“Not kidding, Blake, he’s over there. You should go say hi.”

Jeremy didn’t have to tell him twice and soon found himself alone at the bar sipping on an ice cold, non-alcoholic beer. He knew he could have had a real beer, or two, but he still didn’t feel steady enough within himself to start down that path just yet.

“Do you come here often?” A familiar voice asked from behind him.

“More often when a certain beautiful woman is in town,” he answered with a grin, as he turned to face her. Standing from his stool he leaned towards her and kissed her lightly on her cheek.

“Is this what we do now, Jer? We cheek-kiss in greeting?” She arched an eyebrow.

“What? You don’t think we’re cheek kissers? I think we could be cheek kissers.” He huffed out an overly dramatic sigh. “That said, I definitely would much rather kiss other areas …”

She gave him a playful shove. “I bet you would, Mr. Lewis. I bet you would.”

He shrugged. “How long are you in town for Ms. Davis?”

“Just through the weekend. Why?”

“Do you always answer a question with a question?” he wondered aloud.

“When it comes to you, Jer, there’s almost always a ‘why’ lurking. It’s best to just cut straight to it.”

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