Page 117 of Bring You Back

The hem of the bedsheets where my stare has been fixed comes into focus when Grumbles jumps down and I jolt forward, let my feet carry me to the nightstand. I yank open the drawer and grab the notebook, squeeze what’s left of my brother in my hands. This is all he is now. Black words on white paper. Images and sounds transcribed from my mind to keep him alive.

Julianwasn’tsupposed to see me at the porch light. Hewasn’tsupposed to see myliteral cry for help. Only one person can help me, and he’s dead.Dead.I know Caleb is dead. I have to remind myself all through the night and every morning. I don’t need to say it. I don’t need to talk about it. I don’t need to let the universe grab hold of the words and plant their infected seeds into the soil of the foundation I’ve worked so hard to maintain.

Julian’s already planted his.

It’s too soon. I’m not ready.

I flip to my three word plea and rip it out.

Julian

I rip a piece of splintered wood from the railing behind me and drop it to the sand at my feet. I’m waiting at the entrance to the beach. It’s dark, but there’s enough nearby light to make out the rolling waves, the sway of the surrounding weeds, and my friends whenever they decide to show the hell up. Reyna said she had something to do, but Tommy should be here by now.

He walks up first, halting my mental scolding as he meets me at my spot in the middle of the walkway and leans against the railing. “Welcome back,” he says, half teasing through a look of pride. I want to tell him not to be tooproudyet, but I just shake my head with a slight laugh.

I’d summarized through text what went down with Camille, giving Tommy and Reyna the important points with my added thoughts ahead of time. I wasn’t prepared for that conversation back in the guest room, but it was one I needed.

“Where the hell is Reyna?” I voice, yanking my phone from my pocket to check my texts, wanting to run through this once.

“Right there,” Tommy breathes at the sight of her, but I catch a note of disdain in his voice that makes my head whip up.

Reyna saunters toward us with Banks in tow, the guy practically riding her ass, and I let out a sigh. Well, at least now I know what was taking her so long.

I shove my phone back into my pocket as they meet us, Banks leaping up to sit on the railing. He slides around trying to get comfortable, and I almost warn him about potential splinters in his ass, but I don’t want to encourage his presence. I feel like Camille, wondering why the hell Banks is here, so close to telling him to get lost. At least for this.

“Why’s he here?” Tommy asks Reyna, knowing I hadn’t included Banks in the group texts. Anything involving Camille automatically excludes Banks’s involvement. Reyna probably tried to get rid of him, but that’s not always easy.

“Chill out,” Banks says with a face that morphs to a victory grin. “We had some revenge to exact.” He says this like Tommy asked why they werelateinstead of questioning his overall presence. I can’t help but laugh at him.

“You did that already?” I ask Reyna.

“I wanted to get it over with,” she says, and Banks shoots her a look.

“What’d you do?” Tommy asks, eyes still on Reyna.

“Miss Goody Two Shoes over here only TPed the prick’s house,” Banks answers, and I laugh despite myself. “Iwanted to destroy property,shewanted to decorate it.”

I’m laughing harder as Reyna defends, “I’mnota goody two shoes. And if he finds out,you’rethe one who’s gonna be in trouble.”

Banks rolls his eyes, but her warning cuts off my laughter. “What did you destroy?” I ask him, cautious anticipation in each word.

“His skateboard,” he says like it’s obvious.

“He got to it before I could stop him,” Reyna adds.

“Banks,” I groan.

“Hey, it was Chamomile’s idea!”

“What?” I say, unable to find my usual amusement at Banks’s misnaming. I look to Reyna for an explanation and she exchanges a look with Tommy that lasts too long for my sudden impatience. “What’s he talking about?”

Reyna meets my stare and exhales in reluctance. “Camille put the thought into his head to destroy the board. She was all, ‘He took from you, so take from him.’ And she was pretty adamant about it. Then she got fired,” she adds as a lamented afterthought, eyes at her feet as she toes the sand.

Banks laughs. “Oh, dude, that was hilarious—” Reyna smacks him. “Ow!” He rubs his arm, gives her a flirty grin. “Do that again.”

She chuckles, then exchanges another worried look with Tommy. What am I missing?

“Is there something else?” I ask them, thinking there has to be more, because we’re talking about Camille here. It’s not out of left field for her to suggest some trouble. Especially if it means Banks would carry the brunt.

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