Page 1 of Always Been You
Chapter One
Lawliss
“Hey, Dzifa, I gotta go now,” I say to my best friend, cutting her off mid-sentence as I pull up in front of my husband’s office.
“Wish me luck,” I add quickly, already halfway out of the car. I fumble to set up my camera on the mini-tripod, hands shaking with anticipation, then slamming the door in the process. My heart skips as I hurry toward the building, ready to capture the look on his face when he sees me.
“Call me after, okay? I need all the gist.”
“Yes, ma'am,” I respond with a smile, although she couldn't see me, and then hung up. Dzifa and I have been inseparable since our first year of college. She’s been my rock since then. With everything set up, I take a deep breath and head into the office building, only to be intercepted by the receptionist.
“Do you have an appointment?” I pause, then turn to face her, narrowing my eyes slightly. “Do I need one when I’m here to see my husband, Bella?” I quirk a brow at her, letting the words hang.Now I need an appointment to see my husband. My own husband!Holding back a sigh, I pull out my cards—the ones that state I own the building and can come and go as I please. I rarely use them, but sometimes it’s necessary.
Bella’s face pales as she swallows a visible lump, shifting on her feet. I don’t know what’s going on with her today. I’ll deal with it later.
Heart racing, I steady my breath and focus on my goal. I press the record button and start my introduction in the elevator, my voice a little breathless with anticipation.
“Hey babe. It’s our anniversary today! Cheers to a memory of us and many, many years together!” I raise my hand in a playful toast to the camera, maybe a little too enthusiastic. The elevator dings and my voice echoes down the empty hallway as I turn the camera to catch my surroundings.
Bella hovers just a step behind me, hands clasped tightly in front of her. She barely meets my eyes, glancing down every few seconds like she’s counting the tiles. She probably thinks she’s going to lose her job. Hell, I’d be nervous too if I were her.
My heart thuds in my chest, each step feeling heavier than the last as we approach my husband’s office. There’s something off about the place, something I can’t shake, but I keep my smile plastered on, refusing to let it slip. Today is supposed to be a celebration, after all.
Right?Get your act together, Lawliss.
I notice Bella fidgeting beside me. Well, that makes two of us. We pass the secretary’s empty desk, and I ignore Bella’s weak attempts to stop me as I reach for the office door. I push it open with a smile,“Surpr–”
The word catches in my throat as I stutter and swallow hard. My grip tightens on the handle, and a tear slips down my cheek. I stand there, frozen, unable to process what I’m seeing. I rub my eyes, half-hoping it’s some cruel trick. It’s not.
Strangely, I don’t scream. I don’t shout. My whole body locks up, as if time itself has stopped. I used to think I’d be strong enough to walk away if I ever found myself in this situation. Handling so many divorce cases pro bono over the years gave me time to imagine it but I never thought I’d actually be here.Never.
Derrick. The man I’m married to is on top of someone else, right here in his office. I open my mouth to speak, but no words come out. My lips move soundlessly, my throat tight. “Derrick?” Finally, I murmur, barely recognizing my own voice.This can’t be real. Oh God, no… not today. Not on our anniversary.I step further into the office, squinting to get a clearer view of the woman beneath him.Is that… Is that his secretary? Or should I say, his lover?
“You like it?” he whispers to her, beads of sweat glistening on his forehead as he moves on top of her. She moans, “Harder, yes—harder, like that.” He grips her thighs, thrusting into her with no hesitation.
Why the hell am I watching this?I draw in a shaky breath, feeling my chest tighten as the scene unfolds before me.
Today is our second anniversary. After five years together, I wanted to make this one special, so I took the day off to surprise him. Derrick’s been distant lately, always complaining that I spend more time at work than with him, and I could feel him slipping away. I thought a getaway might bring us back together, so I booked a flight to Florida for this evening with a whole vacation planned just for us.
“How long has this been going on?” I finally manage, keeping my voice steady—my lawyer voice—the one I use to get answers when all I really want is to shout and throw things.
Gripping my tripod, I take a deep, trembling breath, forcing myself to take in every detail of the scene I’ve walked into. Derrick’s head snaps up at my voice, his face draining of color. He shoves himself back into his trousers, fumbling to look halfway decent, while his secretary frantically smooths down her skirt, using her fingers to comb through her hair.
A burst of hysterical laughter escapes me, cracking in my throat as I fight to keep the tears at bay. I lift my head, inhaling sharply.Not today, Satan.I think, swallowing hard as I blink back the tears threatening to spill.
I look straight into the eyes of the man who chose to become a stranger to me because today marks the end of us. He knows I don’t tolerate cheats. For fuck’s sake, he promised he’d love me like he’d lose me tomorrow and I fell for it. He knew how insecure I was about this, yet he still did it.Why? Am I not enough?
He promised he’d tell me if anything changed between us, but I guess that was a lie. How many other lies has he told? Come to think of it, Bella tried to warn me in her own way. I finally understand her silence and I feel stupid for not seeing it sooner.
Have I been blind this whole time? Is it because I can’t carry a child? But that’s not even my fault—he’s the one who refused to get tested after the doctor cleared me. What did I miss? How could I have missed the signs?
I’ve always prided myself on spotting a lie from a mile away—and here it was, right beside me, sleeping next to me, breathing me in.
He told me he loved me this morning before he left for work. Another lie? Am I really that undesirable? Looking at his secretary, who is everything I’m not—curvy, beautiful. It suddenly clicks. I remember how he looked at other women, the ones with curves in all the right places. Whereas I’m built more like an athlete. The only thing I could pride myself on was my chest, and he loved that, or I thought he did. I guess that was a lie, too. I chuckle.
“You know what? Don’t bother answering. You’ll be served with divorce papers and I expect you to sign them unless you want to drag this out.” I smirk, masking the way I’m crumbling inside.
“You can get back to… whatever you were doing,” I say, wrinkling my nose. I turn to leave, only to feel his hand grip my wrist. Slowly, I turn back, my gaze zeroing in on his hand.
