Page 81 of Heartless

My orgasm finally hit me like a freight train. My body shook as I came, as I filled her mouth with my release. She continued to suck me off until the last drop of my cum was gone and I collapsed back onto the bed, my chest heaving as I tried to catch my breath.

The always so proper and put together woman swallowed every drop of my cum. Where did all her inhibitions and restraints go?

Madison slowly released me from her mouth, her eyes hooded as she looked up at me. A mixture of satisfaction and confusion flooded my senses.

There was no coming back from this. I would never again be the man who hadn’t been with anyone since his wife died. And somehow that was like a knife to the gut.

“I have to go,” I blurted out before I could think better of it. Madison straightened up immediately, her sultry expression morphing into a blank one.

“Of course,” she rolled to the side and flashed me a fake smile. “I need a shower anyway.”

She stood up and walked over to the bathroom not trying to hide behind a sheet or a robe. Her skin was still reddened here and there.

I assumed it was an attempt to show that it didn’t mean anything to her. That what I said hadn’t hurt her one bit. But even if I couldn’t control my emotions in that moment or my mouth for that matter, I knew I fucked up.

And knowing Madison, I was going to pay for it one way or another.

Unlike all the previous times I fucked up, I decided I should take immediate action and not let misunderstandings drag on for days.

If I was ready to have sex again, then I should be ready to deal with any complications that came after it.

I followed her to the bathroom. She was already under the water, her back to me. That gorgeous blond hair stuck to her back.

“I didn’t mean it like that.”

“It’s fine,” she said, reaching for a bottle on the wall, squeezed the liquid into her open palm, returned the bottle and turned to face me. “Do you mind cleaning up at your villa? I want to go check on Annie.” She started shampooing her hair and closed her eyes. And thank fuck for that because I needed to take a good look at her like that and I couldn’t do it if she looked at me like she hadn’t just sucked me into oblivion.

Water splashed all over her skin. Her nipples were still hard. My mouth watered at the sight of her. My dick hardened again, which was a bad thing. If she opened her eyes and saw me staring at her tits and cock pointing at the ceiling, that would be even worse than me bailing seconds after she gave me a blowjob. The first one I had gotten in half a decade.

“Madison, I’m sorry.”

Her eyes were closed but I didn’t miss the purse of her lips. “There’s nothing to be sorry for.”

I watched the shampoo foam and water slide down her body. I could have been under the shower with her if I had kept my mouth shut. But I needed to deal with my feelings and I couldn’t do that in Madison’s presence, even though she had shown me only support and understanding ever since she found out about Franny.

But I had to remember it was Madison Hartley. My sad story might have softened her a bit, but she called herself a heartless monster, right? She knew herself better than I knew her. I should trust her judgment.

“Parker,” she said and it made me snap my gaze up from her pink pussy to her face. Her eyes were open now.

“Yes,” I glanced down at my bare feet. “I’ll clean up at my villa. Let me know if Annie needs anything.”

A disappointed smile covered her face. I knew Madison well enough now to recognize her pattern of insulting people in order to protect herself from pain, but the fact she didn’t do it that time around couldonly mean two things. Either she really didn’t care about what we just did or she felt sorry for me.

Turning my back on her without another word, I walked out of the bathroom, got dressed and left The Pink Diamond.

As I walked into The Blue Diamond, I realized I was probably better off over there with Madison.

Franny’s face stared at me from what felt like a thousand different places. I had just been with another woman. And I still believed I was ready. But I hadn’t thought I would feel like I had cheated on Franny.

I tried to take a woman to a hotel once two years ago. It was a complete disaster. She was hot and willing and I was hard up until the moment she started to undress me. I felt disgusted with myself for wanting to move on. And that didn’t happen with Madison.

With her my desire didn't disappear. That was progress.

I showered and shaved and remained in my villa. I tried to watch the wedding video, but my thoughts kept drifting back to Madison and the way I left her.

Was I obsessing because she was the first woman I had sex with after so many years or there was something more to our attraction than just a physical connection? Did we have an emotional bond, or I was imagining things? Maybe I wasn’t betraying Franny's memory at all, seeing as her and Madison couldn't be more different.

I admired Madison on some level and didn’t understand her on another. Maybe if I tried to get to know her, like really get to know her, I would know for sure if there were more than just hormones between us.

---