Page 29 of My Only Luna

“To my office, sweetheart,” he answers, his eyes glinting. I frown at him.

“Don’t manhandle me.”

His smirk vanishes, and he lowers me to the ground as if worried that he’ll trigger me. I mask my smile.He really is sweet, but sweet isn’t enough. He blew Fiona off downstairs, but the moment I’m not around, she will be right there annoyingly stuck to his side, and who knows what he’ll do for her. He enters the room, his hold on me now gentle. Closing the door, he locks it and turns to me. “You promised to talk to me.”

I turn away from him, walking to the window. “K… what do you want to talk about?” I ask quietly.

“A few things. Can you at least please look at me?” He walks over to me, and my heart skips a beat when I realise he’s comeup right behind me. I can feel the heat from his body against me. I sigh and turn, crossing my arms over my chest. He gives me a small smile before taking my hand and leading me to the desk and sits down, lifting me onto the desk in front of him. Looking up at me, he rests his hands on my thighs.

“Make it quick,” I say, looking into those eyes I love.

He nods. “I should have been there by your side and there’s no excuse for it. I failed you,” he starts, a flash of hurt rushes through me and I look away. He takes my hands, kissing them both softly, not caring about the blood that coats one of them. “I know you think you’re alone and I can’t blame you for thinking that. When you needed someone, there wasn’t anyone there; whether it was with your father, those men, or Hank. You’re the one who’s suffered so fucking much, whilst all I did was make empty promises. Promises I truly meant, but couldn’t keep…” He looks down, his voice ridden with pain and guilt, causing my heart to ache.

I can see the slight tremble in his hands, and I want to pull him to my chest and run my fingers through his glossy brown locks and tell him it’s okay.Why does he always break my resolve?I don’t move towards him, despite the crushing pain in my heart that wants me to tell him it isn’t his fault.

“You didn’t mean to let me down, I just…” I sigh, looking towards the window. “I thought he’d succeed. I really thought you’d come, but you didn’t, and then I realised I only had myself. That it’s only girls like Fiona who get the knights in shining armour…” I trail off, my eyes stinging. I swallow, trying to fight back my tears, my hair shielding my face, not wanting him to look at me. He stands up, pulling me into his chest, his heart beating violently in his chest.

“I’m sorry… I’m really sorry, Red, so fucking sorry. I shouldhave been there for you, with you. Nothing I say can undo that, but please give me one last chance to prove myself. I love you. Fuck, you’re everything, Red. No one fucking compares,” he whispers, his voice thick with emotion.

He moves back slightly, cupping my face as I struggle to fight back my tears. “I love you, and only you. I wish I never comforted her; I only protected her as I would have anyone, but unknowingly, I caused you harm by doing so. You’re the only one for me, Kitten, please.” His coarse thumbs caress my cheeks as he places a chaste kiss on my forehead. “The Goddess made you strong because you’re one hell of a fighter.” No longer able to hold my tears back, I close my eyes as they stream down my face.

“I’m always the one left to fend for myself,” I whisper. “I can’t do this. I can’t begin to fall under the false pretence that I can rely on someone who we both know may not even be there when I need them.” I know he saved me from my father, and he took a bullet for me today, but it just hurts too much.

I can see the pain in his eyes at my words. He goes down on his knees, his head level with my chest as he looks up at me, pulling my forehead down to his.

“Then what if I said that I need you in my life to continue living in this fucking world? Without you, there’s nothing to live for. I need you, Kitten, more than anything,” he whispers, his eyes glistening with unshed tears. The love, regret and pain resonating through his words.

And with it, my determination breaks at his words, a sob escaping me.

I need him too, but I’m scared…

Why are we so lost? So close, yet so far? He buries his head against my stomach. I part my legs, still sitting on the desk, and let him pull me close, closing my eyes. Another sob leaves mylips as I wrap my arms around his head, crying into his hair.

This love, it terrifies me so much, yet at the same time I have never felt as many emotions as I do when I am with him. Never have I been so happy, content, and complete. How can I let my walls down when he has already ripped them down and made his way in, no matter how hard I’ve tried to keep him out?

We stay like this, simply holding each other in our embrace. The sun shines through the window, warming our skin. Two souls, so different, like the sun and moon. Yet we fit together like two halves of a whole. Our bond is so strong, that neither of us feels the need for a mate bond to be present.

His hands never leave me, massaging and stroking my back comfortingly. I may not have seen it, but hehasbeen there for me so much more than I’ve realised, doing all these small things he would never have done for anyone else. He has made me face my inner demons. I need him as much as he needs me, and I know only with him will I feel truly complete.

Only when I stop crying does Elijah stop stroking my back and move back, looking into my eyes, brushing away my tears.

“What else did you want to talk about?” I ask softly.

“About initiating you back into the pack. It’s been too long, Scarlett. If you had your mind-link… things could have been different,” he whispers. I look away, knowing there is truth in that, but my eyes burn with determination.

“I’m sorry, but I won’t be joining this pack again.”

Elijah

“What do you mean?” Iask, feeling as if she just slapped meacross the face. I stand up, my stomach twisting. Since returning from our trip, the conversation has been brought up twice, but she has side-lined it both times. Just the thought of her not being in the pack makes me upset and fills me with dread. How will she become my Luna if she isn’t planning on joining the pack?

“I mean I need to handle Zidane. I have a pack who needs me,” she says quietly.

“And I’m going to help you,” I say, “You’re not alone, Red.”

“You have a pack to run. If you’re with me, he won’t believe I’m willing to join him, and I need him to maybe think that I’m ready to do just that.”

“Wait, what? You’re going to try to go alone? Do you think he’s even capable of that? He’s a fucking psycho,” I remind her, frowning.