Page 78 of Creed

I told myself I wouldn’t make any moves until Morgan was fully aware of the kind of life I lived. I knew she would have been disgusted with the fact that I did indeed pay for sex with women, I did have sexual encounters with the women she began to know as friends, and she needed to know how I was beginning to feel about her. That talk needed to happen but not when Addie was around. I regretted not telling her earlier, but it was a minor detail compared to what she was facing, and I wasn’t ready for her to look at me with disgust. A lot of women might not have cared, but for Morgan I thought she would see it as a red flag. She needed to know before someone else told her. The only reason most people knew was because my first contract girl lived at Creed’s Lake. Of course, not in my home, but in one of the rooms on the other side of the bar.

Okay, so the sex club wasn’t my idea, and I was against it at first. It was the brain child of none other than Drakos. I was out voted and eventually it made sense. Members were finding sex elsewhere, rarely stayed within the gates, and coming backwith diseases from Louisville. Morgan accepted the idea of the sex club, and probably had a lot of questions for me, but I wasn’t ready to talk about my part in it.

Addie whimpered, so I ran my fingers through her hair. “Big guy?” She asked in a groggy voice.

“I’ve got you, Addie. We’re home and Auntie Morgan is in the kitchen.”

“Home?” I could feel her yawn.

“Yes, and when you wake up we will show you your room.” I began rubbing circles on her back.

“Mommy?”

That question instantly caused a pain in my chest. “No, mommy is still in heaven.”

“Will daddy hurt her more?”

I shut my eyes just to keep myself in check. “Daddy will never ever hurt mommy or you again.”

“Daddy hurt Auntie Morgan.” She sniffled.

“Daddy can never ever hurt Auntie Morgan or anyone else ever again. He is gone and will not come back.” I promised.

“No more Miss Hope?”

“I’m sorry, but no, you’re always going to be with Auntie Morgan. No more foster care ever again. You never have to be scared or feel alone again.”

She snuggled into me and her hands grasped on to my shirt. Never in my life had I ever held anything so precious.

“Day took me away. No more mommy, no more Caleb, and no more Auntie Morgan. Day take me again?”

I kissed her head. “No, you’ll always be with Auntie Morgan. She’s going to keep you forever. Did you have a good nap?”

She nodded as her head laid against my chest. “Yes.”

I noticed she had a hard time with really just a few words, but not many and she was only six years old. Sometimes she would say certain words right, but say the same ones wrong later. Imagine being expected to learn the entire English language in six years, all the while your dad was kicking the shit out of your mom and you. Addie would be just fine with some structure and the ability to feel safe in her own home.

“I have to potty.”

“Lets go get Auntie Morgan to help you with that, okay?” I wasn’t going to touch that one with a ten foot pole.

When she lifted off me, she looked at me and scrunched her nose as she pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose. “You pee on me?”

I threw my head back and laughed then looked back down at her. Using one finger, I pushed the few strands of her hair that was stuck on her face behind her ear. “No, we just got sweaty.” I noticed she had red lines on her cheek from where my shirt must have wrinkled. She also still had the little toy from her happy meal in her hand.

“I might pee.”

I jumped. “Okay, it’s time to find Auntie Morgan.” I let her down and she took my hand so I could lead her to the kitchen. I noticed she looked around the house like she was amazed. Little did she know, she was going from the most unkept trailer in the trailer court to the biggest house in thecounty. She would never again worry about adults fighting, where her next meal would come from, having clothes with holes in them, or question her safety at night when she’s trying to fall asleep. My biggest regret though, was leaving her in six weeks. That wasn’t supposed to happen.

Addie was still holding my hand when we found Morgan in the kitchen working on dinner. “Somebody has to go potty.” I announced.

Morgan’s eyes lit up when she looked down at Addie. “Somebody had a good and long nap.” She wiped her hands with a dish towel and looked from Addie’s sweaty face to my drenched shirt.

Addie nodded real big.

“Okay, let me show you the bathroom.” She put her hand out for Addie’s and Addie let go of mine and took hers.

“I’m going to go change.” I was soaked from sweat.

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