Page 29 of Piece By Piece

I lean down to talk back, grinning against her skin. “And you hate it when I pick up girls.” She tightens her hold on my neck and keeps dancing.

Then she pulls away, twirls once, and returns to our previous position.

“But you told me you didn’t want me,” she provides. “And you act like you can’t stand me most of the time.”

“Because you’re infuriating,” I tell her. She shakes her head.

“Because we met at the nursing home and you don’t like that I got an insight into your personal life. Because you feel the same attraction I do but are too scared to act on it,” she counters.

“I am not scared,” I insist.

“Then why would you not kiss me? I know you wanted to the last time we danced. And a few times before that. Yet, you never go through with it.”

“I can’t go through with it. We can’t.”

“Why?”

“Because one kiss wouldn’t be enough. Nor would two, or ten, or fifty. Once I felt your kiss, I’d want to feel it all, Aliena. And we can never go there.”

She pulls away and her eyes meet mine. Once again, her desire is apparent and it’s gnawing at my restraint. “Why’s that?”

I sigh, bringing one hand up to cup her cheek. God, just once. I’d love to touch those lips just once. It seems impossible that I plan not to. Ever.

“For better or worse, we’re forced to spend time with each other since we have mutual friends. We can’t change that. If I kiss you, if I take you upstairs, it’s a one-time thing. I’m not interested in anything serious. Still, we’d be forced to see each other again. It’s too complicated,” I explain.

I can tell she doesn’t agree with me even before she opens her mouth. “Then why not indulge one time at least?” she challenges.

“I’m not Mattheo, A. I can’t be chill about watching you go off with another guy. It would be a bad idea.” She must see that. What I’m saying is logical.

But of course, she doesn’t. “You’re already anything but chill about me being with others,” she argues. “It really can’t be worse than it is already.”

Oh, but it could. What if sleeping with her would feel like touching her does? Just so much stronger. I wouldn’t be able to handle it. I’m afraid I’m already addicted to these brief sparks of electricity. If I slept with her, I’m not sure I could stay true to my words and not try to have her again and again.

And that sort of deal is absolutely too messy to risk with someone you share your best friends with.

“I’m not trying to convince you, sorry. I just think we can’t go on like this. Either we get over this weird stage of attraction and jealousy or we do something about it,” she says.

“The first option is not possible. I don’t see myself ever being happy for you if you found someone else like you are for Mattheo.” At least that, I’m sure of.

“Me neither,” she agrees. Then the beat drops and flashing lights blind the room, disorienting me weirdly. I only see enough to know Aliena is smiling and jumping up and down with the rest of the crowd. Wearing heels and all.

I watch her, allowing myself a moment to do nothing other than look at the way she comes to life with the music.

When the song changes – the hurried beat replaced by a slower rhythm – Aliena finds her way back to me without a problem. Her back fits perfectly against my front and this time when we dance, she doesn’t look at me. As if, maybe, she’s trying to ignore the question lingering in between us like I am.

Or maybe because she’s waiting for me to make a decision since the ball seems to be in my corner. She toldme she’d be ready to indulge. I’m the one that said we shouldn’t.

I am seriously questioning my sanity as she keeps rubbing her perfect, lethal body against me. Yeah, no red-blooded straight man would hesitate in my place.

The next time the woman throws her hands in the air, I take one of her hands and twirl her so we’re face to face. She laughs, adding an extra turn before she meets me in the middle. I cup her face and her laughter dies instantly.

“Just one kiss. Tell me you are with me. Nothing more. Don’t let me take you upstairs,” I tell her, practically begging her to keep a clear mind since she stole my ability to do so. Without hesitation, she nods, stepping impossibly closer.

There’s a small, infuriating smile on her lips as her arms lock behind my head. “You better make it count then,” she whispers.

So.

Fucking.