Page 4 of Not Safe For Work

No way

Andie Oh:

YES WAY. The guy is so dumb, he didn’t even go into a stall. He was doing lines at the sink FFS

Me:

So, who caught him? Do you know?

Andie Oh:

That’s the best part. HR did…

Me:

How? There are zero men in HR…right?

Andie Oh:

Like I said, the best part. He must of still been drunk from the night before or something, because he was in the women’s bathroom

I gasp, audibly, and when I look up, I notice Gavin’s been watching me. “The Andie Express?”

I nod with a quick laugh at the team’s name for Sizzl’s rumor mill.

If Andie were anyone else, people would probably hate her for knowing all the company gossip, but in reality, she’s more like the darling of Sizzl. She’s run our marketing team since she started here, plucked from a Google internship and tasked with planning huge events and doing all our social media when the company was a little baby start-up. Now she reports directly to the CMO and has a team of three.

She also has a part-time intern who happens to be Gavin’s little sister, Gabby.

Andie Oh:

I’m heading into the office now – wanna grab coffee?

Me:

Can’t. Have my 1:1 with Mitch in 10. Lunch? Noon? Sushirrito?

Andie Oh:

See ya then buttercup!

Like most other tech companies in the Bay, we have an open office floor plan. Our co-founders both sit at a pod of desks with the other engineers. But our vice president of sales, along with a couple others on the leadership team, demanded his own office.

I lightly knock on the just-barely-open door. “Hey, Mitch. You ready for me?”

“Sure, sure. Come in,” he says, without looking up from his phone.

After a few minutes of sitting in silence, he finishes up the texting and looks at me. He’s probably confused as to why I’m smiling.

“You look chipper. Finally over Ian?” I hate that Mitch knows about my break-up when I’ve barely told anyone other than Andie. So much for HR confidentiality. I knew I shouldn’t have bothered disclosing the break-up, definitely learned my lesson there. In my defense, I could never find the rulebook for dating your company’s investor.

“Ian’s old news. Really, no need to talk about him ever again. I have a new sales prospect.”

“Okay…?”

“Surf and Stream. Their new CMO wants a meeting. Tomorrow.” The words fly from my mouth. But Mitch doesn’t come close to matching my excitement.

“Great. Did you tell Gavin?”

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