“I know you’re worried I’m suddenly going to drop out of school, and I’m not. So you can relax. I’ll figure out something else. I just need some space right now.”
When she opens the door, Kadesha offers a sad smile my way. I think she mouths something like “it’ll be okay,” just before they both leave and the door closes again.
I’m putting Churro in his sling when my phone buzzes. I say a quick prayer it’s Gabby wanting to talk now that she’s cooled down.
Olivia Diamond:
I swear my bed feels less comfortable now. I miss Mexico *crying face emoji*
Sure you don’t wanna hang out?
No, I’m not sure at all. I would love nothing more than to share a bed with Liv again tonight. But the only thing that matters right now is Gabby, and I don’t think I’m ready to dump all my family drama on Liv just yet.
It’s tempting.
Part of me wants to share my predicament. Maybe she could help me figure out how to talk to Gabby, how to apologize, how to make things right. But I also like the fact that Liv doesn’t know anything about my sad story yet. I doubt she’d think of me the same way after hearing about the year Gabby and I were almost homeless.
Me:
Sorry I can’t. See you at work, beautiful
The truth is that as much as I want Liv, Gabby is the most important person in my life. I have to fix this with her before I can even try being with Olivia.
I getinto the office at seven on Monday morning. Gabby has class Mondays until noon and only works at Sizzl Tuesdays and Thursdays, so my plan is to get all my work done by lunchtime and head over to Kadesha’s place.
This is already the longest Gabby and I have ever fought for, and I refuse to let it go on any further.
With my bike, I barely hit any traffic on the Bay Bridge and make it to her place outside Berkeley in record time.
“Had a feeling you’d show up today,” Kadesha says when she opens the door. She’s smiling so I take it as a good sign.
“Is she back from class yet?” I ask.
“Says she’s staying late tonight. A study group or something.” I appreciate that she actually looks disappointed for me. “Come on in. Let’s chat.”
Kadesha’s apartment is full of color, just like her. It’s always been easy to see why Gabby loves her so much. She has this vibrant, yet somehow calming energy.
“I fucked up,” I admit, falling onto the sofa.
“Oh, I know.”
“Wanna take pity on your future brother-in-law and help me?” Her eyes flash. “Come on, there’s no way you two don’t end up together. Plus, I already consider you a sister. You’re stuck with me now.”
She sits down next to me and lays her head on my shoulder. “You’re stuck with me too. I’d miss Churro too much.”
We both laugh, because we know it’s true.
“Gabby loves you. She’s hurtbecauseshe loves you. Just give her some time, she’ll come around.”
“I just don’t want her to do anything drastic.”
“She won’t,” Kadesha says. “She’s not a kid anymore.”
“I know that.”
“Do you?” She looks at me pointedly. “Have you thought about the fact that she’s almost twenty-five years old and might not need you to take care of her anymore? Have you considered that she’s upset because she doesn’t thinkyoutrustedher?”
“What? Of course I trust her. That’s ridiculous.”