Page 19 of Fervency Love

My hurt pride is getting the best of me.You can’t just ghost me like that!Me?!I know what I’ll do!

When I return from school, I meet Max.Now or never,I think.

“Max? Wait up, please.”

“Hey, Abby, what’s up?”

“Listen, does Ve still want to go out with me?”

“Uh, yeah. I think so.”

“Great. Tell him I’ll do it.”

“You’re serious?

“Yes. I’m free on Friday. Five thirty. He can pick me up. Will you tell him?”

Yes!I’ll go on a date with him.My parents are going away to Daisy Valley, so I’ll be left alone. Well, with Grandma, but that doesn’t count. I love my granny, she’s great. I know what to tell her. I’ll go out and be back before she can notice.

The next day at school, when my emotions calm down after an exam and my head is cool enough to think, I’m again assailed by startling thoughts. I’ve never been on a date. Not like this one. Not alone. I’m getting seriously nervous. My self-confidence has dispersed into nothing. I’m fucking stressed out! Suddenly, I come up with a genius idea. I’ll set up a tanning session for eight. That way I won’t have to sit around with him for too long.

It’s incredible that a million things can fly through your head in just a few seconds!

“It’s so exciting that you’re going out on a real date!” Nikki’s cry breaks me out of my train of thought.

“Calm down, girl.” I poke her in the arm, but she’s right about one thing: that weird new feeling of excitement has been with me since morning.

Stop it! It’s only a stupid date.And you’re about to dump him then and there, show him what he loses by keeping you in the dark.That’s what my subconscious says at that moment.

Quarter to five. I’m just about dressed, my lashes are done, hair too, stilettos on. I look okay. Not too provocative, not too modest.

The doorbell rings at five. I open the door and see him standing there, gaping at me, lost for words.

“You look stunning,” he manages after a while, offering me a single red rose. Oh, how nice. Completely unlike him.

“Thanks. You too.”

He’s wearing corduroy pants and a dark blue jacket. He lost his cap. His head is clean-shaven. It’s a turn-on, which surprises me. I always thought I liked boys with longer hair, which you can pull on, run your fingers through…

We walk hand in hand. I feel so small next to him. He’s tall, at least six feet. I’m five foot three. Maybe a bit more in these high heels. He smells of cologne. The scent is narcotic. I’m very susceptible to smells. Now I feel as if it has enveloped me, gently tugging at my senses.

“Where are we going?”

“That one spot. You’ll see.”

We take the bus, and I ask him directly why he wasn’t around. He says he had a rough week but doesn’t want to elaborate. He brushes me off, suggesting that I’m only asking because I missed him. I drop the subject. I’m not going to give him the satisfaction of admitting he’s right. Not to myself and especially not to him. So, I leave him with a curt, “Maybe.”

We reach downtown, walk for a short while, and stop by Lost of Memories. The pub is atmospheric. I’ve never been here.

He asks if I’d like to eat something, but I’m not hungry.

“So, what will you drink?”

“How about you?”

“I’m having a beer.”

“I’ll have the same, only with syrup.”

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