Page 6 of Fervency Love

“Hey, Abbs. I overslept this time. It’s just a coincidence.”

“If you say so,” she mutters, apparently buying my little lie.

I ask her a few questions, but only to be able to stare at her as she replies. I feel her heat as I brush my arm against her. The weather is bad, to say the least. It’s blowing a gale. Her perky nose is red and her lips nearly purple.

“You cold?” I ask.

“Yeah, I hate this weather. I’m never comfortable when it’s not hot. I love the sun. It doesn’t matter what I wear—I’m always cold in the winter. Why do you ask? Oh, must be the nose and lips.”

“Bingo. Besides, I’m the same. I’m always cold,” I say, wondering about just how many things we have in common.

When the bus arrives, it’s full. We stand together by the window. I grab the handle with one hand. I stand in front ofAbby. Despite the difficult start, she seems more relaxed now. The tension has drained from her face. Maybe she’s just shy? Maybe I’m too dead set on making her like me. Despite all that, the distance between us is shrinking, or at least that’s what I feel like. The wall that’s dividing us is slowly crumbling.

We keep talking the whole way. Our eyes meet once in a while. That’s curious—each time they do so, I feel a wave of pleasure. Abbs is rummaging in her backpack when the driver suddenly slams on the brakes, and everyone in the bus lurches forward. Abby barges straight into me. The closeness of her body immediately arouses me. This is so nice and so good! How I wish this moment would last longer. I release my grip on her to let her free herself, though.

“I’m sorry,” she says, dropping her eyes.

“What for? It’s good I was holding on tight. Otherwise, you’d have lost that pretty face of yours.” In my mind, I slap myself in the face for not keeping my mouth shut.

“In that case, thank you,” she adds without further comment. Good. “When do you finish class?” she asks. I have no clue what to say. I don’t even know what day it is. So I evade the answer.

“Why are you asking?”

“I was curious if we’d see each other on our way back.”

“We could if you’d like that,” I say before I think. My heart skips a beat as I wait for what she says next.

“I’m taking the three o’clock bus,” she says finally and leaves. We’re already at her stop.

She turns around briefly and waves goodbye. She wants to see me! Interesting how my body reacts to that diminutive girl. I decide to nose around my school and leave to grab the same bus as her.

The boys are having a good time, as usual. Smoking joints behind the building, skipping class, making fun of teachers. Yesterday they locked one inside a classroom for the giggles.Pretty funny, but on the other hand, a bit too childish for me. I’m growing bored of this place. Sometimes I think I’m wasting time here. That’s not for me. There are classes I like, but there are lots of others that I feel are completely useless.

As soon as the clock shows two thirty, I grab my backpack and run to the bus stop. The bus is only going to show up in fifteen minutes. Maybe I should walk instead? I don’t like waiting. But no. The risk is too high. I might not get there on time. I light up a cigarette. The eleven-eleven arrives. The fifteen minutes passed faster than I anticipated. But the trip to her school seems to last a lifetime, despite only taking up another fifteen. Time is subjective. Whenever you’re in a hurry, it stretches, and as soon as you’d like a moment to last longer, it passes in a flash. I need to wrap my head around that. They should be teaching us shit like that instead of about fucking bugs and spiders!

The bus stops. I see her. She’s looking for someone. Me? She enters but doesn’t see me. I approach from the back, lean over, and whisper in her ear, “Looking for someone, Abbs?”

Our closeness paralyzes me. She spins around, and the stare of her large eyes smashes me into a thousand pieces. Oh, I’m high on her.

“Yeah, you. I was wondering if you’d be here,” she says, her typical shyness gone. She’s blushing. It’s intriguing how different she can be from one moment to the next.

“And here I am.”

“That’s nice.” She smiles, showing me her cute little white teeth.

We talk all the way. I’m not even sure what about. I’m drunk on the sound of her sweet voice. She’s telling me something about school. When we arrive, we keep walking side by side. Close. I wonder if I should offer to walk her home.

“Will you walk me home?” she asks, taking me completely by surprise. Is she reading my mind?

“Sure!” I say at once, trying to sound natural and keep my sudden happiness from her.

As we reach her block, we stop and talk for a while longer.

“I need to go. Thanks for walking me, Ve. See you.”

Returning home, I wonder what actually happened and what this will lead to. Am I ready for what our new relationship is heading towards? I’m a bit stressed out. My inner voice keeps droning on, like a record on repeat:She’ll leave you.You’ll start caring, and she’ll leave you…

Chapter 5

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