Page 26 of His Shy Girl

“Okay, babe. I’ll walk you out.”

Every step towards her car is heavy and feels weighted down with dread. I’m trying to think of something to say. Some way to fix this. I’ve never been in this situation before. I’ve always been confident and sure in everything I do. But I’m fucking clueless right now. I don’t know what she’s thinking. All I know is that she doesn’t want to be around me anymore.

We get to her car and there’s nothing but this omnipresent silence hanging between us.

“I’m sorry you didn’t have a good time tonight, babe.” She turns to open her door, not refuting the fact. “Will you call me when you get home?”

She nods then quickly climbs in. No kiss good night. No hug. Nothing.

“Why can’t you talk to me, baby?” My question comes out a little harsh, but my nerves are gripping my vocal cords and making me panic. I just want her to tell me what I did wrong so I can fix it and make sure I never do it again.

“Please.” She pushes her watery whisper out and my heart breaks. She wants me to close the door and let her leave. She wants to drive away from me. But I don’t want to let her go. I feel like I’ll never see her again.

“Can I come with you?”

The shake of her head stabs the dagger deeper into my chest.

“I j-j-just n-n-need s-s-some t-t-time.”

Time for what? To decide whether she’s going to break up with me? If she needs time to recover from whatever upset her tonight, I can do that. I’ll give her a few hours and then text her. But there’s no way I can handle her walking away from me.

“Okay, babe.” The wordsI love youalmost leave my lips, but I don’t want to say them when she’s upset. I want to say them when she’s smiling at me. When her eyes are glowing with happiness. Or maybe I’m just too afraid that she won’t say them back. “Call or text me when you get home so I know you made it okay.”

I shut her car door and watch as she pulls out. And I’m pretty sure those are tears running down her face as she turns onto the road. My heart sinks to the pit of my stomach. I head straight to my truck, wishing I hadn’t brought her tonight. I knew she hated parties. I knew she was nervous about talking to people, and yet, I kept pushing.

17

Willow

“Willow, darling, what happened?”

I thought my mom would’ve been asleep by now, but I should’ve known she’d wait up. It was my first party, and she wants to know all the details. Plus, I’m certain she wants to make sure I didn’t come home drunk. Although, she’d probably secretly cheer to my dad if I had because it would make me normal. A normal teenager getting tipsy with her friends. But that’s not what happened.

I don’t want to share how horrible the night was. Brennon was completely embarrassed by me. It even got to the point where every time his friends came up to talk to us, he’d quickly give an introduction then steer me away before I had a chance to open my mouth and speak. And it’s not just the fact that he was embarrassed by me. He was totally different tonight. He was quiet and reserved. It felt like he was uncomfortable the entire time.

It was clear he didn’t want me there.

“Do you want to write it down, sweetie?”

I nod my head, and my mom rushes to get me a box of Kleenex and a notepad and pen. I don’t even know what to write. It’s not his fault. I’m not mad at him. I just don’t know what to do.

I had a really hard time talking tonight.

“It’s to be expected.” She nods. “It was a new environment and new people. Plus, you were with your boyfriend and there’s the added pressure of wanting to impress him.”

He definitely wasn’t impressed. Embarrassed is more like it.

Her mouth turns down and she’s giving me that motherly look like I’m being overly sensitive. This is one time I wish I were. “And what makes you think that?”

He looked really uncomfortable every time I spoke. He just seemed miserable the entire night. And I could tell I was holding him back from the fun. His friends kept wanting him to join in to do different things, and he kept looking disappointed that he had to babysit me.

She lets out a sigh, handing me another tissue. I can hear her thoughts, and I’m not overreacting. I know what I saw. I know how I felt.

“Willow, sweetie, I think sometimes you have a tendency to project your fears onto others. He was probably nervous. You know, guys get nervous too. His teenage brain was probably sitting there trying to decide when it would be a good time to lean in and kiss you, and you’re interpreting it as him being uncomfortable. I’ve seen Brennon around you, and that boy is smitten. The way he looks at you is priceless.”

I’m not so sure. If she had seen the way he looked at me tonight, she’d be questioning things too. It was the first time he got to truly see my nerves in action. I don’t usually struggle when it’s just the two of us, and I don’t think he realized what hewas getting into. I don’t think he was expecting things to be so awkward.

I don’t know, Mom. Things just felt off with us tonight.

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