Page 77 of Always Been You

“So, I think it’s time for bed,” Liz says jumping up and gripping onto Hannah’s hand, pulling her up and out of her chair, and leading her toward the tent. Zoey and I get up to join them, saying a quick goodnight before heading into the tent. We all change into our pyjamas before climbing into our sleeping bags. I quickly go and look for my forwarded mail as I haven’t looked at it yet. When I find the stack, I notice it isn’t as thick as it was before.

“Have you guys seen my mail?” I ask.

Liz and Hannah say, “No,” but Zoey is suspiciously quiet. I turn and look at her, but she isn’t looking at me. “Zo,” I start. She lets out a sigh.

“I only took the letters from Drew. You didn’t need to see them. The last thing you need to be reading is nasty notes from him,” she says.

“Did you read them?” I ask.

“Babe, they aren’t good. Just ignore them.”

“What did they say?” I push.

She stares at me for what feels like an entire minute, but she must know that I’m not going to let it go because she says, “He said that he’d win you back. That he deserves you and that you won’t find someone who will put up with your size, so you’re better off just going back to him. It’s all the same shit he’s been spewing. Not a word in those letters is true. You are in a healthy relationship now with someone who loves and cares about you, who doesn’t want to change you.”

I nod and settle into my sleeping bag, allowing her words to sink in. I think it was the final kick in the ass I needed to not let his words affect me as much as they have been. She’s right. I am in a healthy relationship with a man who loves me for me. Josh hasn’t once suggested that I change a single thing about myself. I fall asleep allowing this revelation to sink in.

In the morning, we all get up and eat breakfast before we pack up the campsite. I stay away from the eggs, the smell still making me queasy. We pull out of the campsite at exactly 10:45 a.m., fifteen minutes before check-out. We all leave in the vehicles we arrived in and make our way to the ferry terminal; I hook my phone up to the stereo and put on my variety playlist, and Josh places his hand on my thigh as we drive with the windows down. When we pull onto the ferry, Taylor Swift’s “Paper Rings” comes on, I turn it up and start jamming out to it. Singing along, counting with the song and just as the chorus hits, Josh’s hand comes up to his face as he watches and tries to cover his smile. I continue to sing the song just jamming out and having fun. When the song finishes, I hear clapping and cheering from behind me and turn to see that Caleb has pulled his truck up to the spot right beside us and Matt is filming on his phone while the guys watch me.

I can feel the rush of heat hit my face at the embarrassment. I turn to Matt and point at him. “That gets deleted right now. That video will never see the light of day,” I say.

Matt just chuckles, “I don’t know, this might be great to show your future kids how crazy their mom is,” he smiles at me.

“Matt, I’m your younger sister, the younger sister who spent most of her time growing up hanging out with you and Josh. Do you actually think that I don’t have something that would be, in your words, ‘great to show your future kids’?”

“Liv, you love me too much. You don’t have anything on me,” Matt says with confidence.

“Really, might I remind you of your dry grad night, that wasn’t so dry, and our backyard?”

Josh starts laughing beside me and Matt’s jaw drops. “You wouldn’t?” Matt asks.

“Oh, I’ve got pictures from before Josh, and I helped you inside.”

Matt sends a look to Josh. “You let her take pictures?”

Josh tries to reign in his laughter, but isn’t entirely successful. “Man, I was pretty toast too, and I was laughing. I couldn’t stop her, it was too funny.”

“Fine, never seeing the light of day,” Matt says.

“What happened after your dry grad?” Grayson asks with a shit-eating grin on his face.

“Not talking about it,” Matt says tersely.

Grayson and Caleb both look at me and I put my hands up. “Nope, that video stays gone, and I won’t say anything.”

The ferry docks, and we drive off and make our way to the next ferry. We don’t see anyone on that one and make our way down the island toward Nanaimo for our last ferry. As we get closer, a craving for a Timmie’s bagel with cream cheese and an ice capp hits, so Josh takes us through a drive-through.

We board the ferry and I text the girls that we are making our way to the top observation deck. Josh and I get up there and we go to the front of the ferry. I lean against the railing and Josh stands behind me with an arm on each side of me. He kisses my neck and temple before whispering, “I love you.”

He removes his arms and moves to stand beside me and I look at him with a smile and whisper back, “I love you, too.”

We stand there for a bit, taking in the view. The wind whips through my hair, pieces being pulled out of my ponytail. Ifinish my drink as the girls come and join us. Zoey looks at my drink and a big grin spreads across her face. “Josh stopped at Timmies for you? He really is a good one.”

I look over at Josh, who is smiling at me. I smile back. “Yeah, I know.”

The guys come up and join us and we eventually go inside and find a group of seats. We talk for a bit and when I get a little tired Josh and I decide to head back down to the car. I give Matt and the girls hugs and say goodbye to Grayson and Caleb and the girls all hug Josh before he says his goodbyes to the guys and we make our way downstairs. I fall asleep in the car and don’t wake up until Josh wakes me when we get home.

When we get upstairs, I get all our clothes from the weekend together and put them in the washer while Josh unpacks the cooler with the food and drinks.

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