Page 64 of Bumping into You

The sound of laughter hits my ears, and I turn to see Gwen, Holly, and Margot making their way up the stairs to where we are sitting. Gwen . . . now she is someone worth living my life for.She’s funny, smart, full of life, and feck is she beautiful.

I smile as she glances up. I can see the pink in her cheeks grow once she realizes I’m looking at her.

“You all have fun?” asks Greg, as Holly sits down on his lap and gives him a kiss on the cheek.

“We did,” Holly says. “I love dancing. It’s so much fun, but now I am beat. It’s been such a long day, and we have another port day tomorrow. I’m ready to head off to bed.”

We all agree with a chorus of “same” and “me too,” then head off to our respective rooms.

A wave of energy hits me once I’m back in my room. I tidy up, picking up my brush off the dresser and picking up clothes that I’ve strewn around the room as I walk back out toward the sitting area. Afterward, I take a shower, hoping it will help relieve some of this energy, but nothing helps. After throwing on some pajama pants, I head out to the balcony and pace back and forth.

The vastness of the ocean before me seems to mirror the endless possibilities of my future. The gentle breeze carries a salty scent of the sea, and the moon casts a silvery path on the water as if inviting me to follow it into the unknown.

What is my problem?

Is it that I might be considering moving away from Boston? Selling my mam’s house and moving to Chessie Valley? There’s nothing bad about that. Nothing that would cause me to feel this pent up. I feel like I could run a marathon right now and still have energy left over. It’s the unknown, like I’m at a crossroads for my life, and that feeling is unsettling to me.

I’ve never wanted to settle down, but now . . . now that’s changed. The thought of a relationship, a real relationship with Gwen excites me. Something I never thought would happen.But Mam knew.It wasn’t any one thing with Gwen, but a bunch of little things. I’m happy around her, truly happy, not just hidingbehind a fake wall of happiness.

Her spunk and caring nature draw me in. She’s so easy to be around. And unlike anyone I’ve ever dated before, I want to be with her. I want to try new experiences and see her face when it lights up with happiness. To fix her problems when she’s upset, just to see her smile again.

The sound of singing causes me to stop my pacing. It’s a melody so pure it’s captivating, seeming to both wrap around my heart and hold me still.

My breath hitches when I realize it’s Gwen. Her balcony door’s ajar, letting in the ocean breeze. A gentle light from inside her room casts a soft glow on the balcony. I feel drawn to her. Each word is like a thread pulling me closer.

Moving over to her side of our shared balcony, I listen to her as my heart beats in rhythm to her song. Her rendition of “Conversations in the Dark” by John Legend is stunning. I’m frozen listening to the words coming from her cabin and watching her dance. She’s captivating.

I’m hit with a realization so strong it takes the breath from my lungs—a realization as clear as the moonlight reflecting on the water. The depth of my emotions surges forth like a tidal wave, knocking into me with such a force I can do nothing but stand here and catch my breath.

In the midst of this tidal wave crashing over me, truth dawns on me. The way my heart quickens at the sound of Gwen’s voice, the way her presence feels like the missing piece of a puzzle I didn’t even know I was trying to solve. I want to be more than her fake boyfriend, more than just a friend. I want to hold her hand as we navigate the seas of life together.

With every note, a downpour of thoughts and images flash through my mind: shared laughter, stolen glances and kisses, moments of a life with Gwen, a future with her.

With this realization, the final piece of the puzzle clicks withinme. I’ve fallen hard for her, slowly and deeply. I have never felt this way about someone before. I may have taken off the whole allotted year my mam gave me, but I think I have finally found someone worth trying with.

As her song reaches its end, I’m full of hope for a new beginning for us. I want to be the one to make her laugh, to hold her close when she’s sad, to support her in her hopes and dreams. As the waves lap against the hull of the ship, I feel as if it’s encouraging me and pushing me toward a new future, one I never saw coming. One that is beginning to mean the world to me.

Though her door is ajar, I softly knock on the glass of the balcony door, not wanting to disturb the sereneness of the night. Gwen answers in just her pajama shorts and tank top, causing me to swallow hard at the sight of her. She’s breathtaking.

Cheeks still a little flushed from dancing around her room, she slides open the door a bit wider.

“Hi,” she says. “Is everything okay?”

I’m quiet for a beat, so many thoughts running through my head. What if I’m misinterpreting everything?Sometimes you just have to take that first leap and hope you’ll land safely on the other side,I think to myself.

Shaking my head to quiet the thoughts, I finally say, “Gwendolyn, I don’t want to be fake dating anymore. . . . I, I don’t think I can.”

Gwen gives a sharp intake of breath, her cheeks heating up, before saying, “But . . . the plan. We had a plan. You promised.”

Placing my finger to her lips to stop her spiraling, I say, “You misunderstand,mo ghrá,” the breath from her mouth on my finger stirring even more emotions in me.

“You misunderstand,” I say, brushing a strand of hair out of her face and behind her ear. “I don’t want to be your fake boyfriend; I don’t even want to be your friend. I want to be morethan friends. And I don’t know what that means for the future, but for now, for the rest of the time I have with you on this cruise, I don’t want to pretend anymore. If I’m being honest, I haven’t been pretending at all. My feelings for you are true. I want to be yours, for real, for as long as you’ll have me.”

Chapter 27

Gwen

“I know this is unexpected,” Niall says, his eyes holding mine with an unwavering sincerity.

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