“Did you already mess things up with her?” asks Mitchell. “Man, I told you not to let her go.”
“Let’s leave the poor guy alone,” says Johnny. “He doesn’t need us making him feel worse than he already is.”
I tip my head at him in thanks as I pretend to rummage around in my locker, avoiding eye contact with my crew.
They all trickle out, and I’m left alone. Taking a deep breath, I square my shoulders and prepare myself for the shift. At home, I can wallow as much as I want, but when I’m on duty, it’s no longer about me. It’s about keeping the community and my crew safe. I join the rest of the crew in the kitchen and pour myself a cup of coffee.
The rest of the day goes as normal. No one brings up Gwen, which I’m grateful for. Before long, we get a call.
The days go by in a mix of working at the firehouse and wallowing at home trying to see a way to make things better. And even though Gwen had visited my home only briefly, it feels so empty without her, like she was meant to be there with me, a part of my life.
My calls to Trent are pretty much the same. Gwen is working all the time, doesn’t come hang out with anyone, and when they try to talk to her, she snaps at them to leave.
On Sunday, as I’m getting ready to head to bed before my next twenty-four-hour shift begins, my phone rings. I quickly answer, hoping it will be Gwen, but it’s not.
“Hey, man,” says Greg. “How are you?”
“Miserable, mate,” I say.
“Look, Trent and Margot filled Holly and me in on what happened. And trust me, I got an earful from both Holly and Margot. I’m sorry I ever asked you to spend time with my sister. If I’d had any clue that you two would have hit it off, I never would have suggested anythi—ouch!” Muffled voices on the other end cause him to stop.
Greg continues, “As Holly not so subtly just reminded me, I shouldn’t have ever asked you to begin with, whether I thought you’d hit it off or not,” he finishes, then adds, “I’m going to get a bruise from that.”
“Look, mate, it’s okay. I should have just come clean to her. It’s my fault for agreeing and my fault for not telling her the truth.”
“Sully, you’re a good man, one of the best. I’m going to talk to Gwen, explain to her that it was all my fault, that she should give you a chance to say your piece.”
“Thanks, but I doubt she will,” I say. One thing I learned about Gwen is she can be stubborn. She’s adorable when she is, but no one can force her to do something she doesn’t want to do.
“We’ll see about that,” he says. “Don’t give up on her. Deep down, Gwen cares about you. We all saw it. She wouldn’t be so upset otherwise.”
“Well then, I wish you luck.” I’m quiet for a moment before I add, “I miss her, Greg. I’d do anything for a second chance.”
The next day, Captain Frank pulls me into his office. “Sit down, Niall, I want to talk with you.”
“Yes, sir, is something wrong?” I ask.
“That’s exactly what I was going to ask you. For the past week, you’ve been coming into work, doing your job, and heading home.”
“Am I not doing a good job?”
“You’re doing a fine job. You always do. But you’re not yourself lately and I’m curious, why is that? I need my firehouse to run in tip-top shape. Lives are on the line.”
“Yes, sir. I understand. I’ve been dealing with something, but it’s over, and I just need to let it go.”
“Is it that gal you brought in to meet us a week ago?” he asks.
“Sir?”
“I saw the way you two were, reminded me of when my wife and I first met. It was clear you’re head over heels for that gal. And if I were to guess, I’d say that you messed something up between the two of you.”
“How did you . . .”
“I’ve been around a long time, son, and have learned a thing or two. You need to go after her. Tell her how you really feel.”
“I want to, but I just don’t think—”
“Doesn’t sound like you are thinking at all.”