Page 23 of Cartel King

“You aren’t kicking me out.”

“Do you use your product?”

“Never.”

“Will you expect me to?”

“Never!” He’s shocked I asked, but how could I not?

“Good, because I’ve never even smoked a cigarette. Do you or your nephews deal on the streets?” From my tone, he knows I know the answer.

“I won’t lie and say none of us have. But that hasn’t been my role for more than thirty years. My nephews are too senior for that now. What about the other things you’ve read about me?”

“The violence?”

“Yeah.”

“Nothing about a single interaction I’ve had with you makes me think you’deverbring that around me intentionally. I don’t fear you losing control and hurting me. It doesn’t thrill me to know the lengths you’d go to protect illegal products. But I get that it’s not as simple as what you import and export. You can’t get out and stay alive, so you’re in this for life. What you do protects your family and people who depend on you. Maybe you’re a horrible person, and maybe so are the people who work for you. But there are innocent people who depend upon you, too. Maybe the ends justify the means. I read once that you inherited the position from your uncle. You were born into this, and so were your brother, sisters, and nephews. If this is all any of you’ve ever known—if what you do isn’t just about the money but about protecting your family—then I will never disapprove of what you do. There are no limits to what I would do to protect my sons. None. I won’t fault you for being the same.”

“You don’t think I’m a murderer? You don’t think I’m a criminal? You don’t think I’m?—”

“Have you raped a woman?”

“What? No! I can’t believe you’d?—”

“Do you abuse children?”

“No!”

“Do you abuse animals?”

“No!”

“Then you haven’t crossed the line of what I can’t accept. I’d love to be idealistic enough to believe ethics are universal. Life isn’t that simple. A lot of times, ethics are situational. Is it wrong to kill? Usually. If it’s between kill someone or let my child die, I will put a bullet through that person’s head before my next breath. If I’m responsible for a multi-billion-dollar empire that ensures people have roofs over their children’s heads, food in their children’s stomachs, and clothes on their children’s backs, then I’ll do what I have to provide for those who rely on me. Duty is duty. It’s rarely glamorous.”

“That’s very philosophical.”

“That’s very real for me.”

“It’s why you stayed.”

I don’t need to say anything because it isn’t a question. He gets it. If only he knew the extent of it. But it’s not the time for all my secrets to come out. Or maybe it is, but I’m not ready.

“This brings me to the reason I came over.”

He waits for me, but I only raise my eyebrows. I won’t freak out until there’s a reason to. I won’t waste the emotional energy if I don’t have to. Another coping mechanism. That’s what they used to call it. A trauma response is what they call it now. Who knows what the next term will be? Whatever the hell it is, it’s how I get by.

“Ellie, being with me—being anywhere near me—comes with a level of danger we need to discuss.”

“That’s not surprising, Enrique.”

“But you need to understand what I mean. This isn’t just a passing comment.”

“It’s not like I think you’re some movie gangster, but I’m also not naive to what goes on. I see the news.”

“Chiquita, that’s only a fraction of reality. There’s so much that never gets reported. Many of the stories you read or hear are only an abridged version. I came over tonight because there’s been a car parked on your street the last few times I’ve been in the neighborhood.”

I look toward the living room windows, but I already closed the curtains. As soon as the sun dips, I always close them, but the moment the sun is up, I open them. I love natural daylight, so most of the time, anybody could look in my window. I return my focus to Enrique.

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