Page 151 of Illusory

“That would be the one.”

“I don’t think that counted as a date,” I said, smirking. “Pretty sure you still hated my guts back then.”

“I never hated your guts,” he said seriously. “Not for a fucking second.”

I met his gaze and smiled softly, my fingers brushing his cheek. “I know,” I said quietly, because I did.

Things were complicated between us back then and for many good reasons. I’d never hold it against him, nor would I ever want to change a single second of it. Everything about our beginning was perfectly imperfect, and that was just the way I liked it.

“It still wasn’t a date though,” I teased.

“You say potato. I say it was definitely a date.” He stood up straighter, his tall frame looming over me, before pulling me into his arms and peering down at me. “I know I could have taken you to some fancy restaurant, and maybe I’ll change my mind once we get there, but…I just wanted to do something more meaningful.”

“You could take me to the bottom of the ocean, and I’d happily follow you down.”

His face lit up at my words, and he leaned in for a slow, lingering kiss. I sank into his arms, losing myself in the warmth of his touch as the cold slowly crept in and swept us away.

* * *

We materialized in the back parking lot of the fast-food restaurant, still wrapped tightly in each other’s arms and still kissing just as fiercely. After a few beats, Trace broke off the kiss and stepped back to grab my hand, leading us around the building to the entrance. I would’ve much preferred to stay there and keep making out, but I followed him anyway.

After ordering, he joined me at the table by the window—the same one we’d sat at all those months ago. Except this time, there wasn’t anything on the tray for him.

My heart sank as I stared down at the food. “You’re not going to be eating.”

“Nah. Gabriel and Goldilocks made sure to fill me upwhile you were showering. They wanted to make sure I didn’t snap and eat one of the burger flippers,” he said, his lip hiked up in the corner and setting off his dimple.

I wanted to laugh, because it was kind of funny, but the emotion didn’t quite make it up to my mouth. “You’re never going to eat again,” I whispered, the sadness reaching out to strangle me.

His head jerked back a little before understanding washed over him. “Come on now. That’s not true. I can still eat if I want to, I just…really don’t like it,” he admitted bluntly.

“Right.” I nodded, still staring down at the food as something sad and uncomfortable churned and festered in my stomach before shooting out my mouth. “I’m so fucking sorry for doing this to you, Trace. For taking your—”

“Stop,” he said, reaching across the table to take my hand. “You didn’t take anything from me, Jemma. You gave me another chance to live, another chance to be with you, and that’s all I ever wanted anyway.” He squeezed my hand. “Look at me. I’m not struggling anymore. I’m okay now, Jemma. I’mbetterthan okay.”

I searched his face, taking in the clear blue of his eyes, the relaxed line of his jaw, the easy smile on his lips, and the way he held his shoulders square and proud.

Hewasokay. I wasn’t sure when exactly it had happened, but he wasn’t struggling anymore. He wasn’t angry, sad, scared, or running from death’s prophecies. For the first time in a long time, he actually looked…happy.

“That’s because Iamhappy,” he answered, laughing lowly as I tightened my grip on his hand. “Now can you please stop dampening our date and start eating your burger before it gets cold?”

I gave him one last look over before nodding, releasing his hand to dig into my food. He watched me for a few minutes, asif genuinely enjoying watching me eat, even though he didn’t want anything for himself.

I picked up my strawberry milkshake and took a long sip, memories of that night flooding back to me. “Just as good as the last time,” I murmured, setting the cup back down on the table.

“That was the night I realized I was falling in love with you,” he said quietly, and my heart thundered in my chest as though the sky had split open above us. “Did you know that?”

My lips parted, but no sound came out. I shook my head.

“I was so mad at myself for falling for you because I knew what that meant,” he went on, referring to Morgan’s vision that he would fall in love with me, and it would spell his end. I suppose, looking back, she had been right all along. “But I couldn’t help it, even if I’d tried. No matter what I did, I couldn’t stop thinking about you, dreaming about you…wishing for you. The only time I ever felt right was when I was with you.”

I felt my throat tighten, willing myself not to start crying into my French fries.

“It took me a while to admit it to myself—to accept you were my soulmate, that you were destined to be mine. And when I finally did, I felt so fucking guilty for not accepting it sooner. For not protecting you the way I was supposed to. So many bad things could have been avoided if I’d just manned up and admitted what I felt.”

“You’re not responsible for all the bad things that happened any more than I am.”

“Maybe, but it still feels that way.”

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