Page 86 of Illusory

“Did you hear what I just said?”

“I heard you.” I blinked a few more times and then scrubbed the sleep from my eyes. “Did you try calling her?” I suggested dimly, on account of, you know, still not being fully awake or functional.

“Seven times,” she said and crossed her arms. “It just keeps going to voicemail.”

I couldn’t help but notice the nervous edge to her voice. She was worried, and that really wasn’t like Tessa. “I’m sure she’s fine. She probably just…” I trailed off not really knowing how to finish that sentence seeing as I had no actual clue what Jaqueline did on her own time when she wasn’t with us. “Lost track of time?”

“That doesn’t explain why she’s not answeringnow.”

“Right. Good point.” I definitely needed to get myself caffeinated.

“Did she say anything to you yesterday before she left?”she asked, her gray eyes homing in on me as if she were trying to lift the intel right out of my forehead.

“I mean, not really,” I said, trying to recall my last conversation with her as I tossed the blankets off myself and climbed out of bed. “She basically said she was going out for a while.” I yawned and then stretched my arms, trying to snap myself out of my sleep haze before dragging my feet over to my dresser.

“Going out where?” she asked, following me. “To do what?”

“How should I know, Tessa? She’s not exactly a well of information.” Frankly, I’d been too busy trying to wrap up the conversation and erase any chance there was of being forced to train with her.

In short, I took the win and ran like hell with it.

“Should we try calling her on your phone?” she suggested, standing beside me with both hands on her hips.

I wasn’t sure what difference that would make, unless she (for some odd reason) thought our mother had blocked her number, which would be really weird and inappropriate…but somehow not that surprising either.

“It’s on the nightstand. Knock yourself out,” I answered her as I rifled through my drawers, looking for something clean and semi-decent looking to wear.

She blew out an annoyed breath and then trudged back over to my nightstand. “Aren’t you worried?” she asked as she tapped Jackie’s phone number and then put the phone up to her ear. “This isn’t like her.”

“I mean, it’sa littlelike her,” I said, not even meaning for it to come out as snarky as it had. Not even happy-go-lucky-eating-in-bed-Tessa could deny the facts. M-I-A was basically Jaqueline’s default setting.

“That’s not the same and you know it.”

But it kind of was, though.

“Whatever,” I said instead as I grabbed my clothes for the day and headed to the bathroom to shower. I wasn’t about to start my day in an argument with Tessa over our absentee mother.

And especially not before I’ve had my morning coffee.

* * *

Twenty minutes later, I was showered, dressed, and downstairs, ready to start the day if for no other reason than to get it the hell over with. After my soul-crushing conversation with Dominic ended last night, I’d found myself back in my bed alone, feeling conflicted and guilty and sad and ashamed, and nowhere closer to a resolution.

As far as Dominic was concerned, there was no hope left for us. No chance at a future together. Because in his mind, he was already convinced that I wouldneverchoose him over Trace. And he was right about that.

But what he didn’t realize was that I could never choose Trace over him, either. The more I tried to picture the future, the more I realized how dire and hopeless it really was. I was damned if I did, and damned if I didn’t and screwed six ways from Sunday. The three of us were speeding down a highway to nowhere with absolutely no hope of making it out unscathed.

Not unless something changed.

Not unless I took the wheel and did something about it.

A part of me already knew what that something needed to be, knew intrinsically how this was going to play out, but the other part of me—the part of me that was too weak and selfish to cut out my own heart and burn it to the ground—refused to even look at it. Even as it stared down the barrel of a gun at me.

Because knowing something andowningit were two completely different beasts.

As per usual, our one big happy family was already in the kitchen, seated around the table by the time I finally wandered in, hot on the heel of the alluring smell of bacon and eggs and freshly brewed coffee.

I froze at the doorway, my eyes landing heavily on the newest raven-haired addition at the table.

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